3 more months

I have 3 months left of having a two year old. I must say time has more than flown by. We started out with this perfect little peanut and now I have a full fledged little girl. She doesn't even look like a baby anymore. Sigh....

We were very lucky. The terrible twos weren't really an issue. We had the occasional meltdown but nothing that didn't pass in a few minutes. We did have to put her in timeout maybe a handful of times and each time she sat quietly waiting for it to be over and then was fine.

As we say goodbye to the two's and hello to the three's a lot of things have changed. Kiya is still sassy and sweet but now has developed the whine. Oh yes, we have a very whiny kid right now. I am hoping it is a phase and it will pass QUICKLY. I mean it is really sweet when she says " Mommy, snuggle. Mommy snuggle." But when she says it while we are driving the car or trying to go grocery shopping it can be a little much. And the drawn out whiny voice...wow. She has mastered it.

She has also become more defiant. No has returned as one of her favorite words and she is becoming sneaky. We have had to do time out a couple of times recently for talking back. She is so full of life and sass...she has her own ideas and those don't always line up with what mommy and daddy need for her to be doing.

We are also proud to say she is daytime potty trained. Sure there is still the occasional accident as in one or two every few weeks but that is age appropriate. She is also getting  better about telling us when she has to go and she has been better about telling us she has to poop too. She is such a big girl now.

She is also conquering her cast. She doesn't have the same range of motion or even sight as other kids her age so things like pulling up or pulling down her pants are a tad more challenging. She has now mastered taking off her shorts (and night time pull up) and she is getting better about pulling up her underwear. She is also putting her own sandals on.

She is doing very well in preschool. She knows the days of the week and the months of the year. She is singing all the time and really is quite good at it. We can't wait to sign her up for dance but most places want her to be 3 when she starts the class so we have to wait for the winter/spring sessions. Her teachers are so proud of her and impressed with her singing, writing and more. They say she listens very well and follows directions well. Glad she is going that for them....not so much here sometimes.

Then in January we have to register or at least try for 3 year old preschool at our local private school. They don't take many kids so if that doesn't work out she will stay at her current school and we will try the private school again for 4k.

I am ready and not ready in this weird way for Kiya to grow up. I love seeing her develop and learn and yet part of me misses my little peanut. Nothing I can do to stop or slow time so horrible 3's here we come :) I am slightly terrified to see what she comes up with next.

Fearless

I always had a feeling that Kiya was fearless. This kid doesn't seem to be afraid of much. She LOVES to climb and LOVES to rough house with Daddy. Nothing stops this kid. Not big dogs, not heights, not her casts, nothing.

So today we went to a festival in our town. It is kind of a big deal around here. Kiya had had a bad night. She was SUPER constipated (over share I know but true). We opted for no nap since she slept in past 9am.

We ate some sweet corn and I do mean all of us. Miss Kiya shared my corn on the cob with me. It was so cute and messy.

We then decided to take her over to the little carnival section. We asked her if she wanted to go on a ride and she said yes. So I went and bought some tickets. $13 bucks worth thinking we may give some tickets to others. We went on this bumblebee ride first. It reminded me of the Dumbo ride at Disneyland. She got a little nervous when the bee jerked before the ride started but once we started it was all smiles and laughs.

The kid was hooked. Next we went on the swing ride. She really LOVED that one. We quickly blew through the tickets. She was tall enough to go on some rides by herself but given it was her first time I went with her. I had fun too so it was a win win. She only had to be 36 inches tall to ride some rides by herself. We stood her up next to the chart and she was a tad over 38 inches.

After we realized just how much fun she was having, we just had to buy more tickets. And thus we did. The joy on her face was priceless. She did think though that we were at the park. She kept saying "I like this park. This park is so fun. I come back on Monday." When we were flying high in the air she kept saying, "I go up high. I like to go up high. Weeeeee"

I have had so many fabulous memories with my fearless Kiya that I will cherish and today goes down as another great memory.  We had a great time as a family. If I could hit the repeat button on today, I totally would.  I so completely love being Kiya's mom. She is nothing shy of amazing and I am so proud of her.

Baby K and other updates

Sweet Baby K is now 5 months old and just as cute as ever. We just got new pictures and measurements. She is just too adorable for words really. I can't wait to share her pictures.

She currently weighs about 14.5lbs (28th percentile) and is about 25 1/4 inches (55th percentile) and her head circumference is in the 22nd percentile per CDC growth charts anyway.

I wasn't expecting the new pictures so soon but it was a nice surprise. It has been one month since we first saw her face and now I have 7 fabulous pictures to stare at.

We also finished being fingerprinted by USCIS. We have our I171h already. We still aren't really sure what the next steps are but we know we anxious to get the ball rolling. I know time will fly and our house is so not ready physically for a second child. We need to remodel the basement, get new carpets, paint and I could go on.

In other crazy news, instead of quitting my job which I still will when Baby K comes home, for now I applied for a promotion. It gets me out of the day to day bank sales and more into management. We shall see if I get it or not. I have the peer support. I hope I do. The extra money would be nice especially with all the home projects.

We are also preparing for a vacation. We haven't been to California in 2 years and decided why not take Kiya back to California. I am a little nervous about traveling with a potty trained/training toddler. We have been telling her we are going on an airplane and that she has to sit in her seat and be quiet. We also let her pick out a special travel bag which mommy will fill with special surprises. She picked a little Dora back pack on wheels. So far there is a my little pony in it. There will be a magna doodle, some paper markers, snacks, and other little things she loves including beads and rubber spiders and snakes. Yeah I know. My girlie girl LOVES rubber insects and reptiles and yet also LOVES all things pink and loves to wear beads. We just roll with it. Doesn't bother me in the slightest though the rubber insects are kind of gross.

These next few weeks will be busy as I should find out if I get the promotion at work and we have to get ready for vacation. Fun stuff.

12 years

12 years ago today I married my best friend.  This last 12 years has been one heck of a ride. It is so much more than I expected and so much different than I dreamed. I have this amazing little life and while it wasn't the life I thought I would have it is the life I love and wouldn't change.

Sure we don't always see eye to eye and there is the occasional fight but one thing I know for sure is that through thick and thin, love conquers all.

I am truly blessed. I married a very smart man who just happens to be an amazing father. I knew he would be but I didn't know just how truly wonderful he is. Kiya has him wrapped around her little finger and I just know Baby K will as well. He was meant to parent these girls.

So while these last 12 years have taken us on a crazy ride full of ups and downs. We did it and we did it together. We survived it all still intact and the proud parents of 2 amazing little girls from two very different parts of the world.

I am sure we will still have our share of arguments but one thing will remain the same. Love will get us through. Life is crazy. We have lived crazy and kept on going. Together we can conquer anything as long as we do it together. I am grateful I found the person I can conquer life with. We truly needed each other to get through the last 12 years and we will need each other in the next 12.

So to the love of my life, thank you. Thank you for being there. For being such a great dad and for working so hard so we can have the life we do. I am not sure what us girls would do without you.

The heavy stuff

This blog breaks my heart

Ethiopian Adoption Truth

Adoption is not for the faint of heart. Reading the stories, listening to my fellow adoptive parents has opened my eyes to the sad realities.

I cannot honestly say that for 100% sure everything we learned about Kiya's life pre-adoption is the truth. That is a hard thing to swallow. I want to believe it. I have the words in writing and on DVD but how do I know that is the truth? Will I ever know? If we hire our own translator while in Ethiopia maybe but maybe not.

We learned recently that the orphanage where Kiya spent her first few weeks was one of more than 10 orphanages closed in Ethiopia. I don't normally talk about adoption ethics on here but this was just too much. Ethics have been on my mind for awhile. It was one of the major reasons we made the difficult decision to not adopt from Ethiopia again.

Things in Ethiopia adoptions are a complete mess. There are investigations, orphanage closures and worst kids and families both adoptive and birth caught in the middle. It is tragic. Agencies are lengthening timelines, asking families to consider other adoption avenues. This is not boding well for Ethiopian adoptions. I cringe a little when someone tells me they are starting an Ethiopian adoption. Don't get me wrong a piece of my heart will always belong in Ethiopia. I fell in love. I can't wait to show Kiya the beauty that is Ethiopia. The corruption, the lies, the falsified paperwork and stories is all just too much.

How am I supposed to explain this? How will I answer the tough questions? Our 2 daughters adoptions are so very different. How am I supposed to explain that? I know this post may not make sense but I had to write something. I just couldn't keep it to myself anymore. My heart is breaking. I feel for all of the families caught in the  middle both birth and adoptive. I pray that a system will emerge so that ethical adoptions could continue in Ethiopia but I am not sure that is even possible.

Sigh.....double sigh.....

Adoption update

We have sent in our official acceptance paperwork and it is already on its way to Korea. That is the good news. We are still waiting to hear from our specialist as to what we can expect now, when we can send our first care package and when it becomes really official.

So because there are a lot of unknowns and to protect our baby girl, she will be called for the time being Baby K and we won't be posting any pictures of her. You will just have to trust me that she has a full head of hair and is just plain adorable.

Baby K does have a name here at home and among family. It is the name she was given by her birth mother. Her birth mother chose for her an American first name and then a Korean middle name. We aren't going to change it. We love it and we love that it came from her mother.

For now we also aren't sharing all of the details about sweet Baby K. Some details will for sure come out and other's will stay private but for now it will be private.

This adoption is so very different. We likely won't meet Baby K's mother possibly ever. We will meet her foster mom and family which is amazing. She isn't in an orphanage as was Kiya. Things are just different. One big difference is Baby K weighed at 3 months what Kiya weighed at 6 months. Kiya was well loved and taken care of by the nannies at the care center. Baby K gets a mom figure that takes care of her. A person that she can attach too.

I am anxiously awaiting to hear what the next steps are in this long part of the process besides just waiting. We know we are being fingerprinted by USCIS in a couple weeks so that piece will be done.

So while we wait we will talk about her and look at her pictures. Kiya insists on looking at her pictures all the time. She also insists that "baby walk now". She also said today in the car that she wanted to play with Baby K. I think she is going to make an amazing big sister. It will be an adjustment and I suspect the first months home will be a challenge but in the end. I think Kiya is going to like have a sister to play with. They will be about 2 1/2 years apart in age.

Ok I am officially rambling. I am just so excited to hear the squeals of two beautiful little girls in this house. I am very blessed.

Cast # 4

This post has been brewing in my head for a few days now. I just needed a few days to sort it out and well celebrate the good news of our soon to be baby girl.

Kiya got cast #4 this past Tuesday. It was a VERY long and draining day. Kiya as always was such a trooper. In my heart, I was hoping for just a little even a smidgen of correction in her curve. That was not to be this time. Her stubborn little curve gained 4 degrees. So we started the day at 66 degrees and once again our doc worked his magic and she is holding at 15 degrees in cast. Amazing. Her flexibility is what keeps me going.

I was devastated by the news that her curve got worse. It was a tough blow. However, not only did I have my wonderful husband, I had some dear friends there to help pick me up. And Linda, our nurse to insist repeatedly that all is fine and that I shouldn't be worried. I am so grateful that Catie, Tracy,Sarah and Rachel were there to pick me up after the news of her curve. I am not sure what I would do without these amazing women that I am so honored to call my friends. Catie has been down this road with her iron man and her hope and his progress is such an inspiration to me. Sarah just gets it and well Rachel is so sweet and dealing with her own cast day stuff and yet there she was to be a support.

So after the shock of that news and a nice breakfast chat with Tracy, it was time to get to Miss Kiya. She is usually pretty grumpy post anesthesia but once again my amazing girl just rolled with it. She was a little out of it and a little mad but once she got her crackers and some juice she was much better. I can't thank Tracy enough. She was right there by our sides encouraging Kiya to eat and drink and getting her more crackers. I just met the woman in person that day and wow. So grateful to her for being there when she didn't have to be and for her care and concern for me and for Kiya. I am lucky to have met her.

Kiya was sporting her new pink cast and was ready to get to the tape. She was even helping the nurses tape her cast. She sat so still and was just amazing. I was so proud of her. All was well until it was time to trim the shoulder straps. From there the day was a blur. Kiya was hysterical. I was a mess and the new latex free tape was TERRIBLE. It just became too much at one point.

I hate scoliosis and I hate this cast. There is extra fiber glass, crappy tape and it is so tight. I will be shocked if we don't have sores under her arms.

I hate that sweet Kiya has to deal with this and yet deal with it is what she does. She is truly amazing. She was up and running around that afternoon. She even went to preschool on Wednesday. She asked to go. She had a great time. She went accident free in her new big girl underwear. We had our first post cast laundry room bath and she was totally fine. She rarely if ever complains. She is such a superstar.

So where do we go from here....we keep on casting. That is what the doc says and that is what we will do. So here is to the next 11 weeks.