I did it. I didn't think I could but I did. I know that some of my posts were let's say not so good but I hope a few of them were pretty decent.
It is tough to blog with a 1 year old but I will continue to try but will likely take some days off.
Today we had Kiya's parent-teacher conference at daycare. I know seems weird to have one of these for a 1 year old but whatever. I talk to her teachers every time I pick her up so I knew what to expect.
Kiya's teachers think she is doing just great. She shares toys with the other kids; she loves to put things in a bucket and take things out; she LOVES to throw things; she is very verbal; she eats like a champ (most of the time).
Overall they think she is right on track to slightly ahead in her fine motor skills and her verbal skills which is great. Remember way back in July when Birth to 3 told us she was about 36% behind in her verbal--not anymore :) My gabby little girl loves to blab away. She even talks to high chairs.
Things we and they will continue to work on are her gross motor skills, namely walking and pulling up. She thought about and kind of tried to pull up on one of her activity toys today which was a surprise. She still prefers to pull up using our fingers which at times can get a little frustrating for all parties involved.
Today she also showed a tremendous amount of desire to walk. I mean really walk with very little support. Sure we were still holding on but she wanted to really go. She also tried to take a couple steps holding on to the coffee table and then again with her toy. She doesn't cruise on furniture so we saw this as progress.
We are just encouraging her and supporting her. She will walk when she is ready. This is Kiya we are talking about. She will do it when she wants and no sooner. So we will watch, wait and continue to enjoy her.
Monday, November 30, 2009
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Full and heavy heart
These past few days my heart has been full. Full of love, but it has also been heavy. Behind all the preparations and food and celebrations, I am mourning. I am mourning for Kiya. She can't yet and doesn't understand so it is my place as her mom to do it for her.
I am mourning the loss of her country, her birth family, her right to "fit in" in the land of her birth. I do indeed have a full and heavy heart. We are preparing to celebrate Kiya's first year on this planet and I am sad. I can't and won't let myself stop thinking about Zinash. I wonder what she is doing or thinking or feeling as this day approaches.
One year ago today, she was finishing her classes at school and realized she wasn't feeling well. She went to the clinic that afternoon already in pain and in labor. She told us that. She cried. I cried. We cried together as she recounted the story of Kiya's birth.
She told us she named her Yewibdar because it means "most beautiful one" and that is what she saw when she looked into that sweet baby girls face. You could hear in her voice how much she loved that little girl and that tears my heart apart. She loved her so much to let her go. I don't even have an ounce of that strength.
I am trying to find a simple yet meaningful way to remember Zinash tomorrow. It is important to me that she always be present in my house and that Kiya knows who this woman is. We are hoping to light a candle and say a prayer. We may watch her lifebook DVD. I haven't had the courage to watch it again. We watched it once in Ethiopia and I haven't been able to watch it yet. Kiya is too young to understand it. As she gets older, our jobs as parents get more challenging.
How will we share her story with her...I am not sure. Her story is clear to us but it isn't an easy story to tell. We will share it all with her when she is ready but at first in the early years she may only get bits and pieces. I won't ever lie to her or deny her her story but parts of it are not for young ears and will be a challenge for us to share and her to understand.
Tomorrow will be about us as a family. A whole family and by definition that includes Zinash. We will remember her and cherish her tomorrow and celebrate Kiya. Our Ethiopian Princess is turning 1 and I have a woman half a world away that I wish I could hug again and say thank you but those just don't seem like the right words. How do you thank someone for the best gift you will ever receive? One that caused the giver so much pain....
My heart is heavy today....
I am mourning the loss of her country, her birth family, her right to "fit in" in the land of her birth. I do indeed have a full and heavy heart. We are preparing to celebrate Kiya's first year on this planet and I am sad. I can't and won't let myself stop thinking about Zinash. I wonder what she is doing or thinking or feeling as this day approaches.
One year ago today, she was finishing her classes at school and realized she wasn't feeling well. She went to the clinic that afternoon already in pain and in labor. She told us that. She cried. I cried. We cried together as she recounted the story of Kiya's birth.
She told us she named her Yewibdar because it means "most beautiful one" and that is what she saw when she looked into that sweet baby girls face. You could hear in her voice how much she loved that little girl and that tears my heart apart. She loved her so much to let her go. I don't even have an ounce of that strength.
I am trying to find a simple yet meaningful way to remember Zinash tomorrow. It is important to me that she always be present in my house and that Kiya knows who this woman is. We are hoping to light a candle and say a prayer. We may watch her lifebook DVD. I haven't had the courage to watch it again. We watched it once in Ethiopia and I haven't been able to watch it yet. Kiya is too young to understand it. As she gets older, our jobs as parents get more challenging.
How will we share her story with her...I am not sure. Her story is clear to us but it isn't an easy story to tell. We will share it all with her when she is ready but at first in the early years she may only get bits and pieces. I won't ever lie to her or deny her her story but parts of it are not for young ears and will be a challenge for us to share and her to understand.
Tomorrow will be about us as a family. A whole family and by definition that includes Zinash. We will remember her and cherish her tomorrow and celebrate Kiya. Our Ethiopian Princess is turning 1 and I have a woman half a world away that I wish I could hug again and say thank you but those just don't seem like the right words. How do you thank someone for the best gift you will ever receive? One that caused the giver so much pain....
My heart is heavy today....
Friday, November 27, 2009
Kiya's Thanksgiving and Birthday Party
Yesterday was a fabulous day surrounded by family. It was Kiya's first Thanksgiving and you can tell below that dinner was a hit. She tended to favor the mashed potatoes and stuffing.
And after dinner it was party time. She wore the hat long enough for pictures and then ripped it off.
Yummy Birthday cake was enjoyed by all... except....
Kiya. She didn't seem to like the whole production. She ate really no cake and didn't like the frosting on her face, etc. Not the reaction we expected but by this point in the day she was tired and way over stimulated. We still have birthday cake so Sunday on her actual birthday we will try again.
Here she is surrounded by just a few of the new toys she received. Wow. Looks like a toy store in my living room right now. We don't want a repeat of this at Christmas so we are trying to find a creative way to let people know that clothes, books or a charitable donation would be a better idea. We are kind of toyed out at this point yet very grateful to everyone who thought of Kiya and what she might like.
Overall the day was a lot of fun. At times it was too much for Kiya but she was a trooper. She did go to bed at 6:15pm though and slept all night. She is definitely teething and is acting her age. Her appetite has been less than stellar and formula has been a no go for the last few days. Luckily she is drinking more and more milk each day so our days of formula may be nearing an end.
Two more days and my baby girl is officially 1.
And after dinner it was party time. She wore the hat long enough for pictures and then ripped it off.
Yummy Birthday cake was enjoyed by all... except....
Kiya. She didn't seem to like the whole production. She ate really no cake and didn't like the frosting on her face, etc. Not the reaction we expected but by this point in the day she was tired and way over stimulated. We still have birthday cake so Sunday on her actual birthday we will try again.
Here she is surrounded by just a few of the new toys she received. Wow. Looks like a toy store in my living room right now. We don't want a repeat of this at Christmas so we are trying to find a creative way to let people know that clothes, books or a charitable donation would be a better idea. We are kind of toyed out at this point yet very grateful to everyone who thought of Kiya and what she might like.
Overall the day was a lot of fun. At times it was too much for Kiya but she was a trooper. She did go to bed at 6:15pm though and slept all night. She is definitely teething and is acting her age. Her appetite has been less than stellar and formula has been a no go for the last few days. Luckily she is drinking more and more milk each day so our days of formula may be nearing an end.
Two more days and my baby girl is officially 1.
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Giving thanks
Today we are so blessed to be able to spend the day with our daughter and our family.
We have so very much to be thankful for. First and for most, we are so thankful to Zinash for wanting more for her daughter and loving her enough to let her go. We are thankful for Kiya. She is such a blessing and so amazing. We are thankful for our family and friends who have stood by us through the years and were so supportive during the tough times.
We have so much to be thankful for. 2009 has been and will continue to be a wonderful year for our family.
Wishing all of you out in blog land a Happy Thanksgiving.
PS--Stay tuned for adorable pictures from Kiya's birthday party :)
We have so very much to be thankful for. First and for most, we are so thankful to Zinash for wanting more for her daughter and loving her enough to let her go. We are thankful for Kiya. She is such a blessing and so amazing. We are thankful for our family and friends who have stood by us through the years and were so supportive during the tough times.
We have so much to be thankful for. 2009 has been and will continue to be a wonderful year for our family.
Wishing all of you out in blog land a Happy Thanksgiving.
PS--Stay tuned for adorable pictures from Kiya's birthday party :)
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
It's Official!
I know where are the cute pics--stay tuned as there are lots of great pics coming from Kiya's first Thanksgiving and of course 1st birthday!
But this post is for our Little Man :)
WE ARE ON THE LIST!!!!!
We got the call today. On the unofficial list we are probably around #90 and on the official list I am guessing we are near 370 or higher. So as of now we are about 2 years away from seeing our son's gorgeous face. We know that when our son is ready, he will find his way to us and we will be ready with open arms and an open heart.
The roller coaster ride is starting again and we couldn't be happier.
But this post is for our Little Man :)
WE ARE ON THE LIST!!!!!
We got the call today. On the unofficial list we are probably around #90 and on the official list I am guessing we are near 370 or higher. So as of now we are about 2 years away from seeing our son's gorgeous face. We know that when our son is ready, he will find his way to us and we will be ready with open arms and an open heart.
The roller coaster ride is starting again and we couldn't be happier.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Bill of Rights
I saw this on a blog I read and had to pass it on. Besides this blogging every day thing is tough when you are planning Thanksgiving and a 1st birthday party. I am so glad I read this. Truly amazing and so important.
Copy it, print it off, link to this post, please just pass it along. And while you are at it. Check out this blog. An inspiring story of a woman and her struggles with PAD. She also wrote a book I wish I had read while we were waiting and plan to read to soon.
A Transracially-Adopted Child’s Bill of Rights Adapted by Liza Steinberg Triggs from “A Bill of Rights for Mixed Folks,” by Marilyn Dramé
Every child is entitled to:
Love and full membership in her family.
Have his culture embraced and valued.
Parents who know that this is a race conscious society.
Parents who know that she will experience life differently than they do.
Parents who are not looking to “save” him or to improve the world.
Parents who know that being in a family doesn’t depend on “matching.”
Parents who know that transracial adoption changes the family forever.
Be accepted by extended family members.
Parents who know that, if they are white, they benefit from racism.
Parents who know that they can’t transmit the child’s birth culture if it is not their own.
Have items at home that are made for and by people of his race.
Opportunities to make friends with people of her race or ethnicity.
Daily opportunities of positive experiences with his birth culture.
Build racial pride within her own home, school, and neighborhood.
Have many opportunities to connect with adults of the child’s race.
Parents who accept, understand and empathize with her culture.
Learn survival, problem-solving, and coping skills in a context of racial pride.
Take pride in the development of a dual identity and a multicultural/multiracial perspective on life.
Find his multiculturalism to be an asset and to conclude, “I’ve got the best of both worlds.”
Copy it, print it off, link to this post, please just pass it along. And while you are at it. Check out this blog. An inspiring story of a woman and her struggles with PAD. She also wrote a book I wish I had read while we were waiting and plan to read to soon.
A Transracially-Adopted Child’s Bill of Rights Adapted by Liza Steinberg Triggs from “A Bill of Rights for Mixed Folks,” by Marilyn Dramé
Every child is entitled to:
Love and full membership in her family.
Have his culture embraced and valued.
Parents who know that this is a race conscious society.
Parents who know that she will experience life differently than they do.
Parents who are not looking to “save” him or to improve the world.
Parents who know that being in a family doesn’t depend on “matching.”
Parents who know that transracial adoption changes the family forever.
Be accepted by extended family members.
Parents who know that, if they are white, they benefit from racism.
Parents who know that they can’t transmit the child’s birth culture if it is not their own.
Have items at home that are made for and by people of his race.
Opportunities to make friends with people of her race or ethnicity.
Daily opportunities of positive experiences with his birth culture.
Build racial pride within her own home, school, and neighborhood.
Have many opportunities to connect with adults of the child’s race.
Parents who accept, understand and empathize with her culture.
Learn survival, problem-solving, and coping skills in a context of racial pride.
Take pride in the development of a dual identity and a multicultural/multiracial perspective on life.
Find his multiculturalism to be an asset and to conclude, “I’ve got the best of both worlds.”
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