The hug felt a year later

It is my first Mother's Day with my daughter. Well technically second. We were in the same country last year on Mother's Day but I wasn't with Kiya. I was on a bus for close to 7 hours that day.

On Mother's Day last year, I met the most amazing woman. I met Kiya's Ethiopian mother, Zinash. The day was emotional. The bus ride long. We sat in a room waiting for our turn with a translator. We had no idea what to expect.

We were in the second group of families to be called. We walked into a small, dark room and then she walked in. This amazingly beautiful, young woman who was on the verge of tears. I offered her a tissue. I asked if it was okay to give her a hug. She agreed.

I could tell she was unsure, a little shy and nervous. So were we. We spent about 20 minutes talking with her. We asked her questions. She asked us questions. It was likely 2o of the most important minutes of my life. Minutes that I want to recount for Kiya. Minutes that I hope to repeat in the future with another visit.

After all of the families met their special people, they gathered all of us together for a blessing and an entrustment ceremony. We shared a prayer and we exchanged a candle. And then it was over. We were to leave. They were to leave.

Zinash and I made eye contact from across the room. I took steps. She took steps and we hugged. We hugged for a long time. It seemed like we hugged forever. We exchanged a lot with that hug. My promise to her that I would love and cherish her little girl. Her faith that I was the right one to be Kiya's mother.

I still feel that hug. I will always feel that hug.

It was the most emotional Mother's Day. Here we were two mother's united for the first time with a mix of emotions. We were strangers and yet we were family. We both had hopes and dreams and lots of love for the same little girl.

Now that I am fully a Mom, Mother's Day will always be special but it will be extra special every year because of that hug. I am honored that we could share that special moment together. That we could share so much with no words.

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

Wordless Wednesday is being interrupted again

I know I know, I talk to much but in my defense the title of this blog is Chatty Cathy and there will be pictures in this post.

One year ago today, Zinash came to the Mussie orphanage in Hossana, Ethiopia and handed Kiya to a nanny. A mere 10 days after her birth. We have that moment captured on video. It is extremely difficult to watch that. To see the tears in her eyes. I feel for her. I in some ways am grateful to have this moment to show Kiya just how much her mother loved her but at the same time I hate that a camera was in Zinash's face.

I walked this same path and went to this building. See the picture below. This is where Kiya spent her first couple of weeks in care. My heart is again heavy today. My thoughts are with Zinash and I wish I could give her a hug. I may be able to send her a letter and she may actually get it but more on that later.

While in Hossana, we were also able to meet Kiya's first nanny. She was so sweet and so excited to tell us all about Yewibdar. She told us she was always so content and sweet and such a good baby. I wish there was some way we could send her an update as well. We were able to show her some more recent pictures while we were there but I wish we could send her some more.

So about the letter, our agency has post adoption services that we can and likely will register for. For a small fee, we can send a letter to Zinash and it will be translated in to Kembatissa, her native language. We have heard that the letters are merely dropped off at a local office for parents and we have heard that they are actually hand delivered. We of course are hoping for the latter.

Also as part of post adoption services, when we travel to Ethiopia again and again for a fee, our agency will try and set up another meeting with Zinash. We could actually be able to hug her again and share recent photos of Kiya. I am trying to keep things in perspective that policies change and our agency won't provide this anymore, that Zinash wouldn't want to see us again or they can't find her. If our agency stops providing this service, we will try and find her on our own and will of course respect if she chooses not to see us but I feel like we owe it to Kiya to try and try hard to see her again.

Now what we would say to Zinash in a letter or in person is a tough but I know when the time comes we will find the words. We have to, for Kiya.

Hossana yet again

Our day continued with a tour of the new school in Hossana, a look at the bakery project that helps families make bread so they can sell it and then to a traditional hut style house.

The school was amazing. It isn’t completely done but it is getting there and they are hoping to have it open for the next school year. They are also building some more offices and things there as well.

All the while we were photographing and videotaping the whole thing. Ethiopia is such a beautiful country. The people are so friendly and the children love having their picture taken and now with digital cameras you can show them right away.

There is such an extreme level of poverty yet everyone we encountered was so friendly and wanted to wave or have their picture taken. It was very moving and heartbreaking. The children are so beautiful, you just want to scoop them all up and yet they seem so happy. It makes you think twice about complaining about no hot water or electricity when these children are hungry and have no clean drinking water and yet can still walk around with a smile.

Once we left the school, they drove us to a family’s home. The family was gracious enough to let us come in and take pictures and look around. In the one hut was a family with 6 children, 4 cows and 2 goats and there were a couple chickens and a rooster outside. Yes the family and the livestock all slept in the same hut.

The women allowed us to photograph her with some of her children and her one son just LOVED having his picture taken so I would take his picture and show it to him and then he would shake my hand. It was so sweet. His little sister was just a beautiful little girl with braids in her and she too liked having her picture taken.

All in all the Hossana experience was beautiful and emotionally draining. I am so glad we were able to go on this trip and will be able to share the more rural aspects of Ethiopia with Peanut. The drive back to Addis was long. We were all exhausted physically and mentally. I would be naïve to say that I am walking away from today the same person as when I started. I gained a tremendous amount of perspective and was able to enjoy and absorb so much of Ethiopia in such a short time.

To decompress after the emotional day we had, a bunch of us went to Metro pizza for pizza and beer. It was nice to get out of the guest house and just hang out for awhile.
Tomorrow we are able to bring Peanut to the guest house so we can finally take pictures. We will have her here with us until lunch time. After lunch we are going to a museum, to see the CHSFS hospital, and the we are going out to traditional Ethiopian dinner and dancing.