Kiya is 9 months old today and never in my wildest dreams did I imagine being so in love. She is amazing and beautiful and silly and perfect. I am truly blessed and honored to be her mother.
I am convinced there is no greater feeling than being a Mom. I didn't really comprehend that until I was actually a Mom. To see the growth and progress, the smiles, the laughs just melts my heart in a way I wasn't ready for. It at times has brought tears to my eyes.
Kiya's presence has filled a void in my heart. I knew for many years that something was missing and thanks to the absolute love of a woman 7000 miles away I have a lovely and sweet little girl.
On days like today I think a lot about Zinash. What is she doing? Is she still grieving? Will I be able to accurately tell Kiya just how much she loved her? Will I be able to hug her and see her again?
The bond I have with Zinash was something I am not sure I was ready for either. To have met her on Mother's Day and to feel that connection instantly was completely overwhelming. I am not 100% sure I have truly processed that yet. I will never forget the hugs and tears we shared and the love that was so obvious and so present. She in short is my hero. She was braver and stronger than I ever could have been. I love this woman and she will always have a place in my heart and in my family.
I wish there was some way I could tell her and show her just how amazing Kiya is. We will write post placement reports for the next 18 years and they will be sent to Ethiopia where Zinash can go and see them if she chooses but will she? I don't know and I will never know and that is a little sad yet I understand if she needs to not see them as well.
I know this post is a little unfocused but it is the ramblings of me and what I am processing right now. At this moment I am truly amazed at the love I feel for Kiya and for Zinash. No book or DVD or pre-adoption workshop can prepare you for the feelings that come after the fact. I had to live it and breathe it all in to finally start to grasp it all. It is a lot to take in and a lot to handle. Do I fully understand the scope of this adoption, of my love for Kiya and Zinash and of how things will be in the future? No, I for sure don't have all the answers but I am processing. I will always be processing.
Meanwhile I am so in love with my little girl and I can't wait to see what happens next.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
The fabulous weekend adventures of Kiya
Kiya had a very busy weekend. Here is a recap :)
Saturday:
--Went to State Street for a little stroll. Had lunch (well mom and dad) at Dotty Dumplings (best burgers in Madison) and then Babcock ice cream.
--After her nap, went to the park for the first time and swung on a swing. She LOVED it.
--Showed off for Mom and Dad, her new ability to clap. She is just so cute and very proud of herself.
Sunday:
--Went to CornFest :)
--Attended the first birthday party for her friend Mia. I promise I will post pictures of Princess Mia and the Fabulous Kiya. They are so cute together and their names rhyme :)
--She decided it was time to actually sit up in the bath tub instead of just lounging. She was splashing the water with her hands and grabbing her toys. Usually she would just chill, kick the water and try to grab the wash cloth.
--Again decided to impress Mom and Dad with a new skill. She grabbed her bottle and actually got the nipple in her mouth and drank. She has been able to grab and hold her bottle for awhile but usually would just play with it and didn't quite have the aim to her mouth down pat. Well now she does. :)
We are more and more amazed by Kiya every day. She is really working things out. You can almost see the little wheels spinning in her head. It is just such a neat feeling. She is still trying to figure out the crawling thing but she will get there and soon probably. Better start baby proofing. In the mean time she loves to scoot :)
I have recently gone on quite the shopping spree for Miss Kiya as well. You see she is still a tad on the small size for her age but she has these long legs which are chubby and just wonderful. Well those legs are pushing her out of 6-9 month cloths and right into 12 month. WOW. Do you have any idea how hard it was to find non-flannel pajamas in WI in August in 12 month size? Next to impossible.
As I was shopping and looking at clothes for her it hit me. My little girl is no longer a newborn in the eyes of fashion anymore. She is a big girl. Her pajamas don't come in packs of three anymore and the clothing choices are less baby cute and more little girl cute. It is fabulous and sad all at the same time. Fabulous because she is thriving and growing and sad because it is all happening so fast. 3 months ago she could still wear 0-3 month clothes....
Saturday:
--Went to State Street for a little stroll. Had lunch (well mom and dad) at Dotty Dumplings (best burgers in Madison) and then Babcock ice cream.
--After her nap, went to the park for the first time and swung on a swing. She LOVED it.
--Showed off for Mom and Dad, her new ability to clap. She is just so cute and very proud of herself.
Sunday:
--Went to CornFest :)
--Attended the first birthday party for her friend Mia. I promise I will post pictures of Princess Mia and the Fabulous Kiya. They are so cute together and their names rhyme :)
--She decided it was time to actually sit up in the bath tub instead of just lounging. She was splashing the water with her hands and grabbing her toys. Usually she would just chill, kick the water and try to grab the wash cloth.
--Again decided to impress Mom and Dad with a new skill. She grabbed her bottle and actually got the nipple in her mouth and drank. She has been able to grab and hold her bottle for awhile but usually would just play with it and didn't quite have the aim to her mouth down pat. Well now she does. :)
We are more and more amazed by Kiya every day. She is really working things out. You can almost see the little wheels spinning in her head. It is just such a neat feeling. She is still trying to figure out the crawling thing but she will get there and soon probably. Better start baby proofing. In the mean time she loves to scoot :)
I have recently gone on quite the shopping spree for Miss Kiya as well. You see she is still a tad on the small size for her age but she has these long legs which are chubby and just wonderful. Well those legs are pushing her out of 6-9 month cloths and right into 12 month. WOW. Do you have any idea how hard it was to find non-flannel pajamas in WI in August in 12 month size? Next to impossible.
As I was shopping and looking at clothes for her it hit me. My little girl is no longer a newborn in the eyes of fashion anymore. She is a big girl. Her pajamas don't come in packs of three anymore and the clothing choices are less baby cute and more little girl cute. It is fabulous and sad all at the same time. Fabulous because she is thriving and growing and sad because it is all happening so fast. 3 months ago she could still wear 0-3 month clothes....
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Plumpy Nut and a way to help
If you have a second please read this:
http://www.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1915544,00.html
Now if you have read this and seen the pictures and want to help you can. Some amazing women are running in the Ironman. There is a charity challenge attached to this and they are raising money for Doctor's Without Borders to provide families with Plumy Nut to feed their children in Ethiopia.
For $40 a 6 week supply of Plumpy'Nut can be provided to a family for a child. That supply can be used at home - with the child in the care of the family - and a child can literally be rescued from the grip of serious malnutrition. ( I have quoted another adoptive mom here as she said it so well)
Why is this important? Well Kiya was born in Southern Ethiopia, one region being hard hit by drought and famine. Part of my heart will always belong to Ethiopia and it is my duty as a mom of an Ethiopian child to spread the word and do all that I can to help.
Will you help me?
https://www.kintera.org/faf/donorreg/donorpledge.asp?ievent=296288&supID=246858948
All donations go directly to Doctor's Without Borders and are tax deductible.
http://www.time.com/time/world/article/0,8599,1915544,00.html
Now if you have read this and seen the pictures and want to help you can. Some amazing women are running in the Ironman. There is a charity challenge attached to this and they are raising money for Doctor's Without Borders to provide families with Plumy Nut to feed their children in Ethiopia.
For $40 a 6 week supply of Plumpy'Nut can be provided to a family for a child. That supply can be used at home - with the child in the care of the family - and a child can literally be rescued from the grip of serious malnutrition. ( I have quoted another adoptive mom here as she said it so well)
Why is this important? Well Kiya was born in Southern Ethiopia, one region being hard hit by drought and famine. Part of my heart will always belong to Ethiopia and it is my duty as a mom of an Ethiopian child to spread the word and do all that I can to help.
Will you help me?
https://www.kintera.org/faf/donorreg/donorpledge.asp?ievent=296288&supID=246858948
All donations go directly to Doctor's Without Borders and are tax deductible.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Home for 3 months and the honeymoon isn't over yet
Can you believe it?? We have been home for 3 months. It is still just as sweet and just as perfect as it was the first day. We are so in love with the Fabulous Miss Kiya. She is amazing, beautiful, funny, independent, curious, wonderful, sweet...I could go on and on but you get the point.
We really couldn't have been blessed with a more perfect little girl for our family. It is amazing how this all worked out. Sure we waited for longer than we thought we would but every second of that wait while hard was 100% worth it. Without that wait we wouldn't have met Kiya and that is just unimaginable.
Kiya is doing well considering she is sick. Last night we watched her scoot on the floor. She doesn't crawl but while sitting she will rock back and forth and inch her butt forward. It is so cute and she has this huge smile on her face while she is doing it. You can tell she is so proud of herself.
We really couldn't have been blessed with a more perfect little girl for our family. It is amazing how this all worked out. Sure we waited for longer than we thought we would but every second of that wait while hard was 100% worth it. Without that wait we wouldn't have met Kiya and that is just unimaginable.
Kiya is doing well considering she is sick. Last night we watched her scoot on the floor. She doesn't crawl but while sitting she will rock back and forth and inch her butt forward. It is so cute and she has this huge smile on her face while she is doing it. You can tell she is so proud of herself.
As we get ready to proceed with our process for Little Man, we are facing a much longer wait and I need to remember that it really is all worth it. Our son will find us just as Kiya did and it will be amazing.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
I have been inducted to the "I took my kid to the ER in the middle of the night" club
Yes, it is true. We took Kiya to the ER last night. It was about 10pm and she was sleeping but making these weird moaning noises. I went to see what was going on and she was all tensed up and shivering.
Dave came up and at first we thought she was just dreaming but my Mommy instinct just knew something was wrong. Her unusual behavior continued so Dave picked her up and she proceeded to vomit all over him twice. We noticed she was burning up and still shivering and pretty rigid. We took her temperature and she definitely had a fever and the shivering was continuing.
We new parents were at a loss. We got her dressed and off we went to the new ER in our city that just opened this summer. Thank God otherwise we would have had a 20 minute car ride to get there. By the time we got to the ER, Kiya had stopped shivering but was still really warm.
Well 30 minutes later we were walking out with a prescription for antibiotics and an ear infection diagnosis. She has had an ear infection before but she had never acted like this before. It was kind of scary but we are relieved that it was just an ear infection.
On the plus side, we learned that Kiya now weighs in at 17.3 lbs :)
Dave came up and at first we thought she was just dreaming but my Mommy instinct just knew something was wrong. Her unusual behavior continued so Dave picked her up and she proceeded to vomit all over him twice. We noticed she was burning up and still shivering and pretty rigid. We took her temperature and she definitely had a fever and the shivering was continuing.
We new parents were at a loss. We got her dressed and off we went to the new ER in our city that just opened this summer. Thank God otherwise we would have had a 20 minute car ride to get there. By the time we got to the ER, Kiya had stopped shivering but was still really warm.
Well 30 minutes later we were walking out with a prescription for antibiotics and an ear infection diagnosis. She has had an ear infection before but she had never acted like this before. It was kind of scary but we are relieved that it was just an ear infection.
On the plus side, we learned that Kiya now weighs in at 17.3 lbs :)
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