I have been stewing on this for about a week but I think I just need to write about it. As a very proud and happy Mama I LOVE to talk about Peanut and tell people we are adopting. Well the other day at work and then again when I was getting my nails done I was asked RUDE questions. I am trying to be appropriate in my answers but there are some things I really want to say but don't as they are unproductive responses.
Question: Wow, that's great about your baby. Is she healthy? I mean did they test for HIV? Are you sure she won't have it? You are taking a big risk.
My Answer: My daughter has a full head of hair, big brown eyes and cute little feet. We were given her medical history. We are fully aware of what could be and felt strongly that we would love our child no matter what.
Wanted to say: How rude that is none of your business. I mean you love your children right and would do anything for them so why is this different???
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Question: Oh, how cute. Did her Mom just not want her? What's the story?
My Answer: Actually, her birth mother loved her very much and wanted her to have more opportunities than she would be able to provide. Our daughter's story is private and we will tell her when she is older but are choosing to not share the details with others as it is not our story to share.
Wanted to say: Nothing different. I think I handled that one pretty well.
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Question: Was she born here in America? That is so great that you want to adopt a little black baby...Was her mom doing drugs while she was pregnant? *Yes this was a real question*
My Answer: My daughter was born in Ethiopia.
Wanted to say: Not sure, I just ignored the drug part. Maybe I shouldn't have, not sure....
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Question: Oh, why would you want to adopt from Ethiopia when there are all these cute little black babies in America that need homes? *Again real question*
My answer: Ethiopia spoke to my heart. When we were researching our adoption options, I just knew my baby would be born in Ethiopia. Its a feeling I can't explain unless you have felt it yourself.
Wanted to say: Don't judge me. You don't know my story.
This was a tad overwhelming yet quite eye opening. I know it will not be the last time I get asked really dumb questions. Some people never cease to amaze me with what they think is actually appropriate to ask someone. These questions came from people I barely know yet we so personal. I can't even imagine asking a question like that as it is none of my business. Maybe that is because I know what it is like to be asked really inappropriate questions. I can walk away from this knowing that I think I am getting a little better about answering these questions and I know that I can always just walk away. Some people will never get it.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 29, 2009
2 months old today!
Peanut,
You are two months old today. We just found out that our court date is in April and hopefully all will go well and we can be united with you soon. Know that we are thinking about you every minute of every day. We are working on getting your room all set for your homecoming. We are buying you clothes, toys and lots of books.
Know that you are the sparkle in my eye and the glow in my cheeks. Your presence in my life has truly transformed me. It's not about me anymore, it is about you my sweet baby girl. I can't stare at your sweet face enough. I love you will all my being and anxiously await the day I can hold you in my arms.
In the meantime we pray for you, your care givers, the process and all the other families waiting to be united with their children. I know you are being loved and well taken care of in my absence and that gives me some sense of peace.
Hang in there baby girl. Mom and Dad will be there soon. Just a few more months.
You are two months old today. We just found out that our court date is in April and hopefully all will go well and we can be united with you soon. Know that we are thinking about you every minute of every day. We are working on getting your room all set for your homecoming. We are buying you clothes, toys and lots of books.
Know that you are the sparkle in my eye and the glow in my cheeks. Your presence in my life has truly transformed me. It's not about me anymore, it is about you my sweet baby girl. I can't stare at your sweet face enough. I love you will all my being and anxiously await the day I can hold you in my arms.
In the meantime we pray for you, your care givers, the process and all the other families waiting to be united with their children. I know you are being loved and well taken care of in my absence and that gives me some sense of peace.
Hang in there baby girl. Mom and Dad will be there soon. Just a few more months.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Court Date!!!
We got our court date assigned to us today. It is April 3rd and we are thrilled. We were hoping for March and then just praying if that didn't work that some time before tax day. Our prayers have been answered. Now we have something else to count down and wait for :)
Hopefully, we will make it through the first time but that doesn't always happen. There could be a power outage, a piece of paper missing or some other random thing that happens. The good news is that CHSFS has a great reputation for getting cases through court the first time. If we are delayed it will most likely be some other issue.
I was hesitant to post this today as there were some families that did not make it through court today and have been rescheduled. And some have been rescheduled for March. My heart goes out to all of them. Maybe there is some way their case can be heard earlier??? I surely hope so. I will keep those families in my prayers and hope they are united with their children soon.
Hopefully, we will make it through the first time but that doesn't always happen. There could be a power outage, a piece of paper missing or some other random thing that happens. The good news is that CHSFS has a great reputation for getting cases through court the first time. If we are delayed it will most likely be some other issue.
I was hesitant to post this today as there were some families that did not make it through court today and have been rescheduled. And some have been rescheduled for March. My heart goes out to all of them. Maybe there is some way their case can be heard earlier??? I surely hope so. I will keep those families in my prayers and hope they are united with their children soon.
Prayers
We participate in "Pray for Me... Pray for Others" on the Riggs Family Blog. Check out their blog to add your prayer request.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
I am painting a bench for my daughter...
I said that exact thing today in Home Depot to the nice lady who was mixing my paint. It felt really good to say that out loud. I am painting a bench for my daughter. I know it is a basic sentence but that one sentence warmed my heart today. It actually brought tears to my eyes. That really doesn't take much these days :)
So yes I am painting a bench for Peanut. We received this bench from Peanut's great grandmother. It in it's current state it does not match anything in her room so I am repainting it. It will be a celery green and white.
I also just finished putting a green border around the mural in Peanut's room. I was literally kept awake one night realizing that I needed to find a way to tie everything together in Peanut's room. Her bedding has pink, purple, blue, yellow and green in it with dragonflies, ladybugs and butterflies. Her mural is large animals on Noah's Ark and her room furniture is white. And the wall color is yellow. Well we had the watercolor for her room framed in green so that made me think.
I took the green from her bedding and picked out the green paint for the border on the mural and the green paint for the bench. Okay one step in the right direction. Then I realized that since I got this bedding on discount as it was the floor sample I have every accessory known to exist. We have pillows, curtain valance, mobile, and 5 wall hangings. The curtain valance may not be used but the rest of it will be. The pillows will go on the bench when it is done and we will hang the wall hangings around the room. Ta da. The room will make sense :)
I know silly reason to be up at night but I want her room to be perfect. Okay well not perfect but everything in it was painted or placed with love. I will post pictures when I am done. The goal is to have her room done to share with my neighbors near the end of February when the come over for book club.
Ok back to painting a bench for my daughter.
So yes I am painting a bench for Peanut. We received this bench from Peanut's great grandmother. It in it's current state it does not match anything in her room so I am repainting it. It will be a celery green and white.
I also just finished putting a green border around the mural in Peanut's room. I was literally kept awake one night realizing that I needed to find a way to tie everything together in Peanut's room. Her bedding has pink, purple, blue, yellow and green in it with dragonflies, ladybugs and butterflies. Her mural is large animals on Noah's Ark and her room furniture is white. And the wall color is yellow. Well we had the watercolor for her room framed in green so that made me think.
I took the green from her bedding and picked out the green paint for the border on the mural and the green paint for the bench. Okay one step in the right direction. Then I realized that since I got this bedding on discount as it was the floor sample I have every accessory known to exist. We have pillows, curtain valance, mobile, and 5 wall hangings. The curtain valance may not be used but the rest of it will be. The pillows will go on the bench when it is done and we will hang the wall hangings around the room. Ta da. The room will make sense :)
I know silly reason to be up at night but I want her room to be perfect. Okay well not perfect but everything in it was painted or placed with love. I will post pictures when I am done. The goal is to have her room done to share with my neighbors near the end of February when the come over for book club.
Ok back to painting a bench for my daughter.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Fun books for Peanut
I was looking for a specific book that I learned about on one of my buddy's blogs called "Motherbridge of Love" and I couldn't find it. So I started looking for a couple other books in the children's section. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find children's books? Much less children's books geared to telling adoption related stories at an age appropriate level?? VERY CHALLENGING!!! The books are supposedly in alphabetical order by author yet all of the books I was looking for were nowhere to be found. I will most likely buy them online as I was very frustrated with the Barnes and Nobles children's section. I found the books on their website yet the clerk I asked couldn't even find the books I was looking for in their computer. Weird.
I have already purchased some great books on www.amharickids.com that we can read to peanut and show her about Ethiopia but I definitely need more adoption related children's books. I have found lots geared towards Chinese adoption or international adoption in general that are fabulous but nothing Ethiopia specific. Any ideas???
One good thing came from my search though....
Who knew there was a book called "Peanut". It is a cute little story with a monkey and a beetle. However the monkey is so tiny, he thinks he is a Peanut and he names himself Peanut. He goes on to make friends with all the other animals around him. Peanut and the beetle are best friends and look out for each other in the forest. Yeah!
I bought another book by Karen Katz, called "Princess Baby". It was just to pink and too cute not to pass up. I took a picture of that too but my laptop is not cooperating so you'll just have to take my word for it.
In adoption news: Still waiting for a court date....hopefully we hear something soon. I am guessing we will hear what our court date is either at the end of this week or sometime next week. I would LOVE it if we were fortunate enough to be assigned a date in March but I am trying to remain realistic and plan for an April court date. There are some families that have court dates this week and next so hopefully all goes well and there will be lots of good news floating around the forum.
I have already purchased some great books on www.amharickids.com that we can read to peanut and show her about Ethiopia but I definitely need more adoption related children's books. I have found lots geared towards Chinese adoption or international adoption in general that are fabulous but nothing Ethiopia specific. Any ideas???
One good thing came from my search though....
Who knew there was a book called "Peanut". It is a cute little story with a monkey and a beetle. However the monkey is so tiny, he thinks he is a Peanut and he names himself Peanut. He goes on to make friends with all the other animals around him. Peanut and the beetle are best friends and look out for each other in the forest. Yeah!
I bought another book by Karen Katz, called "Princess Baby". It was just to pink and too cute not to pass up. I took a picture of that too but my laptop is not cooperating so you'll just have to take my word for it.
In adoption news: Still waiting for a court date....hopefully we hear something soon. I am guessing we will hear what our court date is either at the end of this week or sometime next week. I would LOVE it if we were fortunate enough to be assigned a date in March but I am trying to remain realistic and plan for an April court date. There are some families that have court dates this week and next so hopefully all goes well and there will be lots of good news floating around the forum.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Happy Friday! and some special prayers
I am preempting my post today to say CONGRATULATIONS to two of my blogging buddies.
This family received their referral for their sweet baby boy this week. They are with a different agency so their little guy won't be staying at the same place as peanut but I am sure he is being very well taken care of until his Mom and Dad can come pick him up. She wrote a very cute referral day story. Almost missed the exciting news :)
And this family received their referral for their sweet baby girl. She is quite possibly in the same room as peanut. I am SO excited for Leah and her family. She got their referral just in time. They leave for Ethiopia on Sunday. She gets to hug her little girl in just a few days. (She is traveling on a different visa so she has to go over before her court date) I can't wait to hear about her trip. She is definitely one cool lady with a really big heart.
And while I am at it let's give some good cheers to this family as they are working their way up the list. They are so close to their son. I can't wait to hear their good news.
Then there is this family that made a tough decision to switch agencies and do what is best for their family. I am so happy they they have found peace and will hopefully be on the wait list VERY soon.
Lastly, please pray for this family and this family. I won't talk about why they need the prayers but just if you remember please pray for them. They each have their own stuff going on and I hope they find peace, answers, and joy along their paths.
This family received their referral for their sweet baby boy this week. They are with a different agency so their little guy won't be staying at the same place as peanut but I am sure he is being very well taken care of until his Mom and Dad can come pick him up. She wrote a very cute referral day story. Almost missed the exciting news :)
And this family received their referral for their sweet baby girl. She is quite possibly in the same room as peanut. I am SO excited for Leah and her family. She got their referral just in time. They leave for Ethiopia on Sunday. She gets to hug her little girl in just a few days. (She is traveling on a different visa so she has to go over before her court date) I can't wait to hear about her trip. She is definitely one cool lady with a really big heart.
And while I am at it let's give some good cheers to this family as they are working their way up the list. They are so close to their son. I can't wait to hear their good news.
Then there is this family that made a tough decision to switch agencies and do what is best for their family. I am so happy they they have found peace and will hopefully be on the wait list VERY soon.
Lastly, please pray for this family and this family. I won't talk about why they need the prayers but just if you remember please pray for them. They each have their own stuff going on and I hope they find peace, answers, and joy along their paths.
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