I have under taken a project. I am calling it Project Fill Me Up. I sent out an email to some family and friends so they could help me.
Here is the email that I sent out:
We are hoping to travel to pick up our daughter in May. While we are in Ethiopia for a week we would like to drop donations off at AHOPE when we go to visit.
AHOPE for Children is a non-profit organization whose mission is to serve the children of Ethiopia, with a primary emphasis on caring for orphans infected with HIV. In Addis Ababa, AHOPE's two pleasant, well-staffed Children's Homes care exclusively for orphans who are HIV+ and have no extended family to care for them. Many of these children are now finding their forever families through adoption. AHOPE's Community Outreach Program enables orphaned children to remain within their extended families and culture, while receiving medical care, education, food, and other services.
We have received word from a dear friend that this organization is in desperate need of medical gloves. I am making it my mission to bring over a suitcase full of medical quality gloves. I purchased a box yesterday at Walgreens ( I found them near the diabetic supplies). I know the economy is tough right now but if you find you have a few extra dollars and would like to help me fill my suitcase I would greatly appreciate it.
So I have gotten a great response so far. I have friends that are going to send me money so I can buy more boxes, some are going to buy boxes of gloves and get them to me and a very kind offer from someone I don't know personally offered to give me some boxes of gloves. She and her family are involved in medical missions in Guatemala and she thinks she can send some boxes of gloves with me to Ethiopia. How awesome. So if anyone is reading this and wants to help, leave me a comment with your email or if you are on Facebook I am on there as well or if you have my email you can email me directly or if you use the CHSFS forum you can send my a private message.
A special thanks to www.forever2young.blogspot.com for letting me know what is needed and giving me the inspiration for this project. You are amazing girlfriend!
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
Preparations and random thoughts
We have started to prepare for our upcoming trip to bring home Peanut. We are gathering formula, diapers and some other much needed items for donations to CHSFS and AHOPE. On Sunday, I pulled out a bunch of Peanut's clothes in an attempt to figure out what we will bring with us. We have our water bottles, our paperwork, our suitcases and hopefully soon our new laptop.
Well all of this preparation stuff led me to stay up way too late last night thinking about some very random but relevant things.
1) What size clothes should we bring for Peanut?? She will most likely be between sizes so she might fit in 0-3 month or she might fit in to 3-6 month and even then that depends on which clothing company you are looking at. Why can't all clothing companies make clothes the same size??
2) Is 20 onesies too many to bring with us? Since I don't know what will fit and what won't what is a Mom supposed to do??? And I am notorious for overpacking....
3) I really need to get some more 1 gallon Ziploc bags. You see other families have suggested packing one baby outfit an a diaper in a Ziploc so when you need to change baby in a tight space you just have to grab the Ziploc and wipes and you are good to go. The bags will also double as a great way to contain the messiness of diaper blowouts that I have heard so much about.
4)We really need to order the new laptop. We have been saving for one and I want to make sure we get it in time to travel. Our current one is VERY old and VERY heavy.
5) At some point I need to figure out how we are going to board the dogs while we are gone. Vet for cheaper or Camp K-9 which will cost more but the dogs will get more attention and they have staff on the premises 24 hours a day. (Can you tell which way I am leaning...)
6) I need to make a list of things we still need to get for both us and for Peanut.
7) Do we have enough freezer containers for food? I am planning on making up a bunch of food before we go so we have home cooked meals and not take out when we come home.
It was a long night of laying awake in bed. I blame daylight savings and the dogs. My schedule is all off because of daylight savings and my dogs were consuming the entire lower half of the bed last night only on my side so I had ZERO leg room.
The preparations will continue and I am sure I will have more random thoughts to put in order and figure out. I am trying to stay ahead of the game since we will only get a few weeks notice for travel. Not sure if that is a good idea or if it will just lead to more random thoughts...
Well all of this preparation stuff led me to stay up way too late last night thinking about some very random but relevant things.
1) What size clothes should we bring for Peanut?? She will most likely be between sizes so she might fit in 0-3 month or she might fit in to 3-6 month and even then that depends on which clothing company you are looking at. Why can't all clothing companies make clothes the same size??
2) Is 20 onesies too many to bring with us? Since I don't know what will fit and what won't what is a Mom supposed to do??? And I am notorious for overpacking....
3) I really need to get some more 1 gallon Ziploc bags. You see other families have suggested packing one baby outfit an a diaper in a Ziploc so when you need to change baby in a tight space you just have to grab the Ziploc and wipes and you are good to go. The bags will also double as a great way to contain the messiness of diaper blowouts that I have heard so much about.
4)We really need to order the new laptop. We have been saving for one and I want to make sure we get it in time to travel. Our current one is VERY old and VERY heavy.
5) At some point I need to figure out how we are going to board the dogs while we are gone. Vet for cheaper or Camp K-9 which will cost more but the dogs will get more attention and they have staff on the premises 24 hours a day. (Can you tell which way I am leaning...)
6) I need to make a list of things we still need to get for both us and for Peanut.
7) Do we have enough freezer containers for food? I am planning on making up a bunch of food before we go so we have home cooked meals and not take out when we come home.
It was a long night of laying awake in bed. I blame daylight savings and the dogs. My schedule is all off because of daylight savings and my dogs were consuming the entire lower half of the bed last night only on my side so I had ZERO leg room.
The preparations will continue and I am sure I will have more random thoughts to put in order and figure out. I am trying to stay ahead of the game since we will only get a few weeks notice for travel. Not sure if that is a good idea or if it will just lead to more random thoughts...
Friday, March 6, 2009
Game plan for the next 2 months
I have made some decisions about how the next two months will have to be if I am to retain any grasp on my sanity. We figure all goes well we are about 8 weeks from traveling maybe 9 but hopefully less. We are getting so much closer to our little girl I almost can't stand it.
We got a good dose of reality this week and I very much appreciate that but for now I am taking one day at a time. I have to. I cannot let my mind take over. I have a choice. I can sit and fret and worry and drive myself crazy or trust my doctor and wait and see. I know what could be and I will face things as they come. I am getting nowhere by re-reading things or googling anything. In fact the Internet is a dangerous place for a worried Momma. I am done with all of that for now. I have learned and read as much as I can and can't do anymore until we have more info and I have Peanut in my arms.
I have prayed a lot in these last few days. Prayed for Peanut, the caregivers and my sanity. Part of me will always be a worried Momma as it comes with the job but I have found a little peace. I have to. I am no good to Peanut if I am a wreck. We will face whatever challenges may lie ahead when we need to but I am done worrying about things that may never be. Sure those 'could be's' are in the back of my head but I am very hopeful that Peanut will be just fine. She is just one tiny little girl right now. That said she is my little Peanut and I will be her biggest advocate and cheerleader.
We got a good dose of reality this week and I very much appreciate that but for now I am taking one day at a time. I have to. I cannot let my mind take over. I have a choice. I can sit and fret and worry and drive myself crazy or trust my doctor and wait and see. I know what could be and I will face things as they come. I am getting nowhere by re-reading things or googling anything. In fact the Internet is a dangerous place for a worried Momma. I am done with all of that for now. I have learned and read as much as I can and can't do anymore until we have more info and I have Peanut in my arms.
I have prayed a lot in these last few days. Prayed for Peanut, the caregivers and my sanity. Part of me will always be a worried Momma as it comes with the job but I have found a little peace. I have to. I am no good to Peanut if I am a wreck. We will face whatever challenges may lie ahead when we need to but I am done worrying about things that may never be. Sure those 'could be's' are in the back of my head but I am very hopeful that Peanut will be just fine. She is just one tiny little girl right now. That said she is my little Peanut and I will be her biggest advocate and cheerleader.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
The last 24 hours....
To say that the last 24 hours have been a little rough is an understatement. I have a battle going on between my head and my heart.
A little background...we sent Peanut's latest measurements off to the doctor. She came back with a "mildly concerning" response. She was hoping to see more weight gain and overall growth. She said that Peanut is falling behind a little and we want to see her stay even or gain. We should watch things over the next month and then if not improved ask for additional medical evaluations to make sure we aren't missing something and then listed the things at that time we would check for which were kidney issues, metabolic disorders and mild/moderate cerebral palsy.
I spent time yesterday charting her growth on the CDC growth charts and the WHO growth charts, crying, reading and seeking some reassurance. Hence the battle that ensued.
My head is telling me that I picked this doctor because she would give me the worst case scenarios. She wants me to be prepared and worried and not take anything for granted. This is what I wanted. I wanted a doctor to give it to me straight and not sugar coat anything. I am grateful to know all of the possibilities.
That said, my heart disagrees. I am a new mom whose little girl is half way across the world. I haven't gotten any new pictures and only get monthly numbers about her growth. My heart took over yesterday and I cried for my little Peanut. I want so badly to be with her and to hold her and I can't and that just plain stinks.
So after some reading and some VERY kind words of reassurance from others who have been in my shoes my heart and head have aligned sort of. I am still a worried Momma but I have a better grasp on the things that could be and the things that are more likely to be.
For instance, head circumference is very difficult to measure accurately. We have asked for a new measurement to see what that comes back as. The stress of the environment that Peanut is in could also be affecting her growth. I have learned that growth is good. I have also learned that proportionally she is small across the board and that is okay. I know that she will need to catch up but also realize how important it is that she doesn't catch up too quickly. And most importantly, other babies her age and older with similar measurements have been just fine.
Part of the issue is we don't know if she was premature or what she weighed at birth and sometimes those things factor in when plotting growth. She also had a little tummy trouble upon arrival at the care center and was on medication so that could have been a factor as well.
All in all, I could not have survived yesterday without my fellow adoptive Moms. I learned a TON from them and their reassurance helped tremendously. I do have tremendous faith in the staff that is watching over her. They are AMAZING and I have been told that they are quick to pick up on things if they think there is an issue. I know that there still could be issues and I am okay with that. Peanut is our baby girl and we will do anything we have to for her. Now if they just let me get on a plane so I can go get her, we would be off and rolling.
A little background...we sent Peanut's latest measurements off to the doctor. She came back with a "mildly concerning" response. She was hoping to see more weight gain and overall growth. She said that Peanut is falling behind a little and we want to see her stay even or gain. We should watch things over the next month and then if not improved ask for additional medical evaluations to make sure we aren't missing something and then listed the things at that time we would check for which were kidney issues, metabolic disorders and mild/moderate cerebral palsy.
I spent time yesterday charting her growth on the CDC growth charts and the WHO growth charts, crying, reading and seeking some reassurance. Hence the battle that ensued.
My head is telling me that I picked this doctor because she would give me the worst case scenarios. She wants me to be prepared and worried and not take anything for granted. This is what I wanted. I wanted a doctor to give it to me straight and not sugar coat anything. I am grateful to know all of the possibilities.
That said, my heart disagrees. I am a new mom whose little girl is half way across the world. I haven't gotten any new pictures and only get monthly numbers about her growth. My heart took over yesterday and I cried for my little Peanut. I want so badly to be with her and to hold her and I can't and that just plain stinks.
So after some reading and some VERY kind words of reassurance from others who have been in my shoes my heart and head have aligned sort of. I am still a worried Momma but I have a better grasp on the things that could be and the things that are more likely to be.
For instance, head circumference is very difficult to measure accurately. We have asked for a new measurement to see what that comes back as. The stress of the environment that Peanut is in could also be affecting her growth. I have learned that growth is good. I have also learned that proportionally she is small across the board and that is okay. I know that she will need to catch up but also realize how important it is that she doesn't catch up too quickly. And most importantly, other babies her age and older with similar measurements have been just fine.
Part of the issue is we don't know if she was premature or what she weighed at birth and sometimes those things factor in when plotting growth. She also had a little tummy trouble upon arrival at the care center and was on medication so that could have been a factor as well.
All in all, I could not have survived yesterday without my fellow adoptive Moms. I learned a TON from them and their reassurance helped tremendously. I do have tremendous faith in the staff that is watching over her. They are AMAZING and I have been told that they are quick to pick up on things if they think there is an issue. I know that there still could be issues and I am okay with that. Peanut is our baby girl and we will do anything we have to for her. Now if they just let me get on a plane so I can go get her, we would be off and rolling.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
30 days and 30 wonders
We are 30 days from our court date so in honor of Peanut here are 30 things that I wonder about her in no particular order.
1) I wonder what she smells like... may seem weird but I LOVE the smell of babies and miss the smell of formula in my house
2) if she will look like her birth mom
3) when she will call me Mama
4) if she will be sitting up when we meet her
5) if she will be scared when we first show up
6) if she will make that cute little grumpy face she is making in her referral photo (can't wait to post that)
7) if she will still be wearing 0-3 months clothes at 6 months
8) if she will still have a fully head of hair
9) if she like tummy time or if she will hate it
10) if she will like to be carried in the Ergo
11) if she will sleep through the night
12) if she will survive the plane ride home with at least one clean outfit left
13) if she will like bath time
14) if she will like my meager attempts to fix her hair
15) if she will laugh a lot
16) when she will first smile at us
17) will she be afraid of the pugs
18) will she be outgoing or shy
19) will she be ticklish
20) will she ever be on the growth charts
21) will she like sports, music or both
22) will she like to climb trees or play dolls or both
23) will she like injera
24) if she will want long hair or short
25) if she will like to give hugs
26) if she will ever know how much we love her
27) when she will crawl
28) what her first word will be
29) will she still suck her thumb
30) if she will understand her story when we tell her
Peanut, we love you and we miss you. We are getting that much closer to being with you as a family. Hang on baby girl, Mom and Dad will be there soon.
We did get our growth update on Peanut. She is 3 months old and weigh 8.7lbs and is 21.2 inches long. She gained over a pound and a half in the last month which is great. She also had a growth spurt which is great. Her head circumference is a little small and not on the charts which is a little concerning. We sent the info off to the doctor and are waiting to hear back from her.
1) I wonder what she smells like... may seem weird but I LOVE the smell of babies and miss the smell of formula in my house
2) if she will look like her birth mom
3) when she will call me Mama
4) if she will be sitting up when we meet her
5) if she will be scared when we first show up
6) if she will make that cute little grumpy face she is making in her referral photo (can't wait to post that)
7) if she will still be wearing 0-3 months clothes at 6 months
8) if she will still have a fully head of hair
9) if she like tummy time or if she will hate it
10) if she will like to be carried in the Ergo
11) if she will sleep through the night
12) if she will survive the plane ride home with at least one clean outfit left
13) if she will like bath time
14) if she will like my meager attempts to fix her hair
15) if she will laugh a lot
16) when she will first smile at us
17) will she be afraid of the pugs
18) will she be outgoing or shy
19) will she be ticklish
20) will she ever be on the growth charts
21) will she like sports, music or both
22) will she like to climb trees or play dolls or both
23) will she like injera
24) if she will want long hair or short
25) if she will like to give hugs
26) if she will ever know how much we love her
27) when she will crawl
28) what her first word will be
29) will she still suck her thumb
30) if she will understand her story when we tell her
Peanut, we love you and we miss you. We are getting that much closer to being with you as a family. Hang on baby girl, Mom and Dad will be there soon.
We did get our growth update on Peanut. She is 3 months old and weigh 8.7lbs and is 21.2 inches long. She gained over a pound and a half in the last month which is great. She also had a growth spurt which is great. Her head circumference is a little small and not on the charts which is a little concerning. We sent the info off to the doctor and are waiting to hear back from her.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Random pictures
I haven't posted pics in awhile so here are a few. We went to Target this weekend and I think if I could have a love affair with any store it would be Target. This first picture is of this adorable hat that I bought for Peanut :) Not sure why it is vertical so just turn your head and you will get the drift. :)
Here are a couple of pictures of the dogs. Sebastian is first and as you tell he is annoyed. Nothing like a annoying human to stick a camera in his face while he is trying to sleep oh and the flash was on. Oops. I see an extra treat for him later.
Here is Badger. I wouldn't normally take such an up close picture but he was just standing there being adorable and kind of in the way of my other pictures so I took it. And yes he always looks sad.
Since we were at Target, I decided it was time to start gathering things for our big trip. We need water bottles to bring with us so ta da here they are.
And on the donation front; soy formula was on sale so we picked up a couple of cans to add to our donation suitcases.
No other news to report....We are hoping to get a growth, weight and head circumference update on Peanut soon. Definitely this week I would think. Other than that just trying to plan the next 31 days (that's how long it is until our court date). I want to stay nice and busy so time flies by.
Here are a couple of pictures of the dogs. Sebastian is first and as you tell he is annoyed. Nothing like a annoying human to stick a camera in his face while he is trying to sleep oh and the flash was on. Oops. I see an extra treat for him later.
Here is Badger. I wouldn't normally take such an up close picture but he was just standing there being adorable and kind of in the way of my other pictures so I took it. And yes he always looks sad.
Since we were at Target, I decided it was time to start gathering things for our big trip. We need water bottles to bring with us so ta da here they are.
And on the donation front; soy formula was on sale so we picked up a couple of cans to add to our donation suitcases.
No other news to report....We are hoping to get a growth, weight and head circumference update on Peanut soon. Definitely this week I would think. Other than that just trying to plan the next 31 days (that's how long it is until our court date). I want to stay nice and busy so time flies by.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Good food, great people!
Last night Dave and I went out to dinner with 20 or so people we have never met. We went to the Ethiopian restaurant in town. The food was fabulous as always and the company was even better.
It was so great to put faces with names and to start to get know these people. They were couples, single moms, people home for years, people travelling in a few weeks, people with referrals, people close to referral and people just starting out. It was a very diverse group of people.
I would say last night was definitely a highlight in the almost 6 years that I have lived here. Don't get me wrong I love my neighbors and my friends, but these people last night just get it. They get the whole process. How hard the waiting is, the struggles with infertility, the awkward looks and questions people ask when you tell them you are adopting from Ethiopia or they see you with your Ethiopian child.
I met people who knew what it was like to hate everything pregnancy and baby related while you are struggling with infertility, people who understand how frustrating the process can be and the not knowing is, people who used to live on the West Coast and understand my love of the Nordstrom shoe department and how awful it is that we don't have one here. ( I know I could drive to Chicago but really 3 hours just for shoes...)
After dinner we went out for drinks with some of the others and had even more fun. It was nice to relax and unwind and for me to finally feel connected in this crazy place we call home. I never have really felt like I found my niche and I kind of think I found it last night. I made some strong connections with people and can't wait to hang out again.
It was so great to put faces with names and to start to get know these people. They were couples, single moms, people home for years, people travelling in a few weeks, people with referrals, people close to referral and people just starting out. It was a very diverse group of people.
I would say last night was definitely a highlight in the almost 6 years that I have lived here. Don't get me wrong I love my neighbors and my friends, but these people last night just get it. They get the whole process. How hard the waiting is, the struggles with infertility, the awkward looks and questions people ask when you tell them you are adopting from Ethiopia or they see you with your Ethiopian child.
I met people who knew what it was like to hate everything pregnancy and baby related while you are struggling with infertility, people who understand how frustrating the process can be and the not knowing is, people who used to live on the West Coast and understand my love of the Nordstrom shoe department and how awful it is that we don't have one here. ( I know I could drive to Chicago but really 3 hours just for shoes...)
After dinner we went out for drinks with some of the others and had even more fun. It was nice to relax and unwind and for me to finally feel connected in this crazy place we call home. I never have really felt like I found my niche and I kind of think I found it last night. I made some strong connections with people and can't wait to hang out again.
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