To watch or not watch

Ok--so tonight is the American Idol Gives Back show. It is a big fundraiser that raised over $76 million dollars last year.

I am torn as to whether or not to watch this event. I admire the desire to raise money for ailing countries and communities here in the US but I have thought a lot about this since my last post on this topic.

My forum friends at CHSFS made me really think about this event and what that says about Ethiopia and other African countries or communities. I get that the intention is to tug on the guilt strings of Americans and ask them to help others. Really I get it but as a future parent of a child from a third world country I don't know how I feel about these stereotypes that are being portrayed on television. Don't get me wrong, I think that we as Americans are very fortunate people and we should give to others but I take issue with all the assumptions that will be thrown at me and my family based on something someone saw on television.

I am fully aware of the challenges we will face as white parents raising an African-American child and all that is portrayed on TV are these horrible and often brutal images of life in Ethiopia. How will I explain that to my child? I have said before my intention of adopting internationally and Ethiopia specifically has never been to "save" a child or to relieve my "guilt". I am adopting for purely selfish reasons. I want to be a mom more than anything and there are children in this world that need parents. Are people going to start assuming, if they don't already, that we are adopting to "rescue" this poor child from this horrible place called Ethiopia? I don't know yet.

I know that if they showed the rolling hills and beautiful countryside and churches that can be found in Ethiopia that the number and amount of donations wouldn't be so high. I want the even to be successful and raise money, I am just thinking long and hard about the images of Ethiopia that my child may be exposed to and how a lot of those images aren't always positive.

I must also say that I am not in denial about the realities of everyday life in Ethiopia. I know the power goes out almost everyday and for up to 10 or 12 hours. Some places have generators and others don't. It is very difficult to get things done without power. I am also very aware of the overwhelming numbers of children who won't grow to be adults and that women who give birth to a child have a 1 in 14 chance of dying. I know that medical care is scarce but getting better. I know that schools are scarce but are popping up more frequently.

I guess what I am saying is that I want the show to raise money and help countries like Ethiopia but I want my child to be proud of where they came from. Negative portrayals on TV, will make my job as an adoptive parent harder than it already will be. It will be my goal to show all the beautiful things Ethiopia has to offer to my child. I don't want them to be sheltered but things will be shared at age appropriate times. Since we are adopting an infant, they won't have memories of life in Ethiopia and we will have to fill in the blanks. I don't want those blanks to be all negative.