Here

On this day last year we were on our way to the airport. We were going to Ethiopia. We were coming home parents. I am still in shock that it has been a whole year since we made that 23 hour journey half way around the world.

I heard this song on the radio the other day and I cried when I heard the chorus. It is a Rascal Flatts song, called "Here"

"And I wouldn't change a thing
I'd walk right back through the rain
Back to every broken heart
On the day that it was breakin'
And I'd relive all the years
And be thankful for the tears
I've cried with every stumbled step
That led to you and got me here, right here"

My journey to motherhood was not easy. It was a long and winding road, but I am here and happier than ever.

In reality, as hard as the infertility was and as hard as losing the twins was, I know in my heart I had to go through those things to get me where I am today. There was a greater plan involved here. At the times that my heart was breaking I didn't get it. I was angry. I was hurt. I was confused.

Now I get it. I was meant to be Kiya's mom. No one ever said life was easy and I can attest to that. I survived 6 plus years of heartbreak and tears to get to my baby girl.

I can't believe I am about to write this but I would do it all again. All the tears, the years, the pain, the heart break, the stumbled steps just because I know it all leads to me being Kiya's mom and that is the best job in the world.

So in a weird way, I am thankful for the past. I learned a lot and I became a lot stronger. I knew that if I could handle everything life had thrown at me than I was more than ready to be a mom.

I am truly and eternally grateful for everything that has gotten me here. I wouldn't want to be anywhere else..okay except maybe Ethiopia. I am here. I am a Mom and I am blessed. Life is good.