Learning Curve

I am already learning so much about adoption, Ethiopia, parasites and so much more. We started our journey to adopt in November of 2006 with the intent of adopting domestically. All of that changed after a really long summer and 2 months of fostering African American twin girls. We had hopes of adopting these girls so we took a legal risk placement, knowing that the birth parents could decide to parent their children. Well, we took placement of the girls in June and by early August, the birth father had decided that he wanted to parent his daughters. It was one of the hardest days of my entire life to hand the girls back to the social worker. We totally fell in love with them and so did our family. While it was hard, I truly believe it was a wonderful 2 months, we learned a lot about parenting, and it reaffirmed our decision to want to be parents. I know that God must have wanted us to have this experience no matter how hard it was. I have faith that the right child will find our family and those girls weren't meant to be permanent members of our family. God wanted us to offer those 2 girls, 2 fabulous months and give their parents the opportunity to make a very difficult decision. While I want to say I would do things differently so we could avoid the pain, I don't know. I loved those girls and everything that they were able to offer us and we were able to offer them.

After a vacation and some soul searching, in the fall of 2007 we decided to leave the domestic adoption pool and start our journey to Africa. In the process, we have read so much about Ethiopia and the people that live there. We gave all of our child's grandparents books about Ethiopia so they learn more as well. All of our family in friends know about the journey we are embarking on and we feel very supported.

Just about everyday I log in to read the message boards at our agency's website. I can't even begin to tell you how much I have learned from the other families who are also waiting or have already traveled to bring home their children. I have been inspired, challenged and a little scared. I definitely have a fear of parasites and getting sick. From these message boards, I have learned a valuable lesson. No matter what I may or may not come home with, it will be all worth it as I will be a parent to a beautiful Ethiopian child. (And if I do get sick, I have been told that it won't be as bad as I thought it would be).

I have learned about which airlines we should and shouldn't fly. How many suitcases to bring, what things we should bring to donate, what place we should eat pizza at, that there is a Home Depot in Addis Ababa, to bring ear plugs to drown out the sound of the barking dogs at night, that the nannies at the care center are remarkable, caring, loving people, and so much more.

Most importantly though, I have learned that no matter what, I should take the trip to Hossana. I have been so inspired by others who have already traveled and their inability to put into words how powerful meeting their child's birth family was. Sure I am nervous about this but I wouldn't miss it for anything if we are able to do this trip (IE if it is still available to us when we go) we will be there. I have been told we should bring a lot of tissues with us at it will be a very emotional experience. I am a crier anyway so I might bring the whole box. I keep thinking how amazing it will be to share this experience with our child as they get older. I never imagined that in international adoption, we would have the opportunity to meet members of our child's birth family. How amazing that we can thank these brave people in person. We will always be forever grateful to our child's birth parents and anxiously await being able to meet them.