Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Love
This video is wonderful. Makes you think about all the love in your life. I am thankful to be able to share it with you. Check out Kevin and Stacie's blog. They are going a cool give away to win an even cooler t-shirt. And make sure you check out the super cutie at the end of the blog post. That's their daughter!!!
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Supreme Sweetness
I have noticed that I talk a lot on this blog about Kiya's sassy side or her silly side so today I am focusing on her sweet side.
Kiya really is a very sweet kid. She loves to give hugs and kisses and climb in your lap. It is just too cute for words.
Recently she has started to pull on my shirt so I get closer to her and then she gives me a big hug. The first time she did this we were in a coffee shop. She just reached out and grabbed my shirt collar and hugged me.
She did it again last night. I was getting her out of the high chair and she grabbed my shirt and pulled me over for a big hug. She did it again and this time I got a hug and a kiss. And then again one more time for a kiss.
She wasn't always so affectionate. When we first came home she had trouble making eye contact and she wasn't a fan of being held for too long. She wasn't used to it. The nannies even told us she was a content baby so she spent a lot of time by herself. She didn't demand affection.
She does now and we couldn't be more thrilled. We have come a long way in this area of attachment and bonding and it feels good. Really good.
So I am now convinced that I have the sweetest (and smartest, and sassiest and silliest) almost 18 month old around. It makes long boring days at work so much better when you get to come home to Kiya.
Kiya really is a very sweet kid. She loves to give hugs and kisses and climb in your lap. It is just too cute for words.
Recently she has started to pull on my shirt so I get closer to her and then she gives me a big hug. The first time she did this we were in a coffee shop. She just reached out and grabbed my shirt collar and hugged me.
She did it again last night. I was getting her out of the high chair and she grabbed my shirt and pulled me over for a big hug. She did it again and this time I got a hug and a kiss. And then again one more time for a kiss.
She wasn't always so affectionate. When we first came home she had trouble making eye contact and she wasn't a fan of being held for too long. She wasn't used to it. The nannies even told us she was a content baby so she spent a lot of time by herself. She didn't demand affection.
She does now and we couldn't be more thrilled. We have come a long way in this area of attachment and bonding and it feels good. Really good.
So I am now convinced that I have the sweetest (and smartest, and sassiest and silliest) almost 18 month old around. It makes long boring days at work so much better when you get to come home to Kiya.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
1 year later
One year ago today, our plane landed after 23 long hours of flight and time zone changes. We were home. We were a family of 3 at home.
The first few weeks home were a total blur. Dave and I both came home sick and Kiya with a double ear infection. We were trying to establish some sense of normal and recover from the crazy jet lag. Kiya was FABULOUS, it took her maybe 2 days to get on a normal schedule. Thankfully, since it took us parents a little longer to recover.
1 year. A whole year as a Mom. I did it. We survived. Kiya is thriving. We are bonded. We are attached. We are in love. It has been one heck of a year. So much better than I thought it would be. It was all that I hoped for and yet so much more.
That isn't to say we didn't hit some speed bumps. We did. There was an unexpected Hep C antibody issue, some post adoption depression, some marital adjustments, some lonely dog issues. But we survived all of the speed bumps and came out stronger.
This year has been a learning process for all of us. The anxieties have gone. The fear that I was going to do something wrong is gone. The dread of "what if we don't bond" is gone. In its place is lots of love, laughter and joy.
I learned a lot of important things in the last year. Namely, no one is perfect including me. I had to learn to let go. To let myself make mistakes. To not be 100% all the time. It took time and sometimes I still have to work on this.
I learned to give myself space and to give my daughter space. We need to figure each other out. That it was okay that that took months. In fact it was normal that it took months. I learned to not be so hard on myself.
I learned that I do in fact have Mommy instincts and that I need to listen them. Who knew? I know now. If my gut is telling me something is up, then something is up. This took time. I had to be really connected to Kiya. We are connected. I know what this cry means or that scream or that grunt. We understand each other now. I don't scramble any more or run to the ER at 10:30pm for an ear infection. I have the tools to figure it out.
I think the most important thing I learned in this last year is that I LOVE being a mom. It is the hardest and most rewarding job I could ever have and I wouldn't change a thing. Being Kiya's Mom is nothing short of amazing.
I wasn't sure at one point in my life, if I ever wanted to have kids. That all changed when I met my husband. I knew then that we could be great parents yet until we were parents, I had no idea how we would do. Could we handle it? 1 year later I can confidently say yes. We can handle this parenting thing. We love this parenting thing with all the ups and downs and in betweens.
And most importantly we love Kiya. She is our sunshine.
The first few weeks home were a total blur. Dave and I both came home sick and Kiya with a double ear infection. We were trying to establish some sense of normal and recover from the crazy jet lag. Kiya was FABULOUS, it took her maybe 2 days to get on a normal schedule. Thankfully, since it took us parents a little longer to recover.
1 year. A whole year as a Mom. I did it. We survived. Kiya is thriving. We are bonded. We are attached. We are in love. It has been one heck of a year. So much better than I thought it would be. It was all that I hoped for and yet so much more.
That isn't to say we didn't hit some speed bumps. We did. There was an unexpected Hep C antibody issue, some post adoption depression, some marital adjustments, some lonely dog issues. But we survived all of the speed bumps and came out stronger.
This year has been a learning process for all of us. The anxieties have gone. The fear that I was going to do something wrong is gone. The dread of "what if we don't bond" is gone. In its place is lots of love, laughter and joy.
I learned a lot of important things in the last year. Namely, no one is perfect including me. I had to learn to let go. To let myself make mistakes. To not be 100% all the time. It took time and sometimes I still have to work on this.
I learned to give myself space and to give my daughter space. We need to figure each other out. That it was okay that that took months. In fact it was normal that it took months. I learned to not be so hard on myself.
I learned that I do in fact have Mommy instincts and that I need to listen them. Who knew? I know now. If my gut is telling me something is up, then something is up. This took time. I had to be really connected to Kiya. We are connected. I know what this cry means or that scream or that grunt. We understand each other now. I don't scramble any more or run to the ER at 10:30pm for an ear infection. I have the tools to figure it out.
I think the most important thing I learned in this last year is that I LOVE being a mom. It is the hardest and most rewarding job I could ever have and I wouldn't change a thing. Being Kiya's Mom is nothing short of amazing.
I wasn't sure at one point in my life, if I ever wanted to have kids. That all changed when I met my husband. I knew then that we could be great parents yet until we were parents, I had no idea how we would do. Could we handle it? 1 year later I can confidently say yes. We can handle this parenting thing. We love this parenting thing with all the ups and downs and in betweens.
And most importantly we love Kiya. She is our sunshine.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Kiya updates
Life has and will always be busy busy, but here are a few updates on the fabulous Miss Kiya.
1) Walking: Nope, not yet. She is still trying to stand up in the middle of the room and is getting better. She has also finally with some prompting and A LOT of dramatics started to push a walker toy across the room. They have her do this at daycare and we do it at home. She usually screams at us while walking of course. At this point we are just waiting for her to decide that she wants to do it. We don't carry her as many places anymore, we make her walk. She will do it eventually and when she wants to not when we want her to.
2) Scalp issues: Well, we are on week 1 of oral meds complete. We felt after much thought that we had no other choice. She got a patch of ringwom under her eye and we think in her ear and then we found an additional 3 spots on her head. It didn't look like ringworm but it sure was acting like it. We tried to get into a dermatologist but they were booked until June. Not fun. We hated to do it but we were outnumbered at this point. The plus side is that Kiya LOVES the medicine.
3) Speech: Kiya is learning her name though it comes out "teeya" or "deeya" sometimes but on occasion she says Kiya. Too cute. She has learned the word "go" but her favorite word is still "no." She can also say "hot dog", and "itsy bitsy". She has learned to shout which is fun. She talks non stop all the time and if she isn't talking she is singing. Usually ABC song or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. We even catch her doing the hand motions for Twinkle Twinkle when she is singing to herself. She is also trying to say her teacher's name which is Staycee but comes (taycee) most of the time.
Kiya is such a joy to watch. She is learning so much and growing so much. We think she is going through another growth spurt. I can't wait for her 18 month check up to see how much she weighs and how tall she is. We are hoping for 24 lbs and we are sure she is at least 33 inches long. Some of her 18 month pants are starting to look a little short. Bring on short season please :)
We still have the occasional tantrum which is to be expected and they are usually frustration based that she can't get where she wants to and no one is going to help her get there. She is smart and can figure it out so we are not caving to her dramatics. I think once she walks that will help with the tantrums.
Kiya is such a feisty and energetic kid and is always on the go. She is wearing us parents out by the end of the day but we wouldn't have it any other way.
1) Walking: Nope, not yet. She is still trying to stand up in the middle of the room and is getting better. She has also finally with some prompting and A LOT of dramatics started to push a walker toy across the room. They have her do this at daycare and we do it at home. She usually screams at us while walking of course. At this point we are just waiting for her to decide that she wants to do it. We don't carry her as many places anymore, we make her walk. She will do it eventually and when she wants to not when we want her to.
2) Scalp issues: Well, we are on week 1 of oral meds complete. We felt after much thought that we had no other choice. She got a patch of ringwom under her eye and we think in her ear and then we found an additional 3 spots on her head. It didn't look like ringworm but it sure was acting like it. We tried to get into a dermatologist but they were booked until June. Not fun. We hated to do it but we were outnumbered at this point. The plus side is that Kiya LOVES the medicine.
3) Speech: Kiya is learning her name though it comes out "teeya" or "deeya" sometimes but on occasion she says Kiya. Too cute. She has learned the word "go" but her favorite word is still "no." She can also say "hot dog", and "itsy bitsy". She has learned to shout which is fun. She talks non stop all the time and if she isn't talking she is singing. Usually ABC song or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. We even catch her doing the hand motions for Twinkle Twinkle when she is singing to herself. She is also trying to say her teacher's name which is Staycee but comes (taycee) most of the time.
Kiya is such a joy to watch. She is learning so much and growing so much. We think she is going through another growth spurt. I can't wait for her 18 month check up to see how much she weighs and how tall she is. We are hoping for 24 lbs and we are sure she is at least 33 inches long. Some of her 18 month pants are starting to look a little short. Bring on short season please :)
We still have the occasional tantrum which is to be expected and they are usually frustration based that she can't get where she wants to and no one is going to help her get there. She is smart and can figure it out so we are not caving to her dramatics. I think once she walks that will help with the tantrums.
Kiya is such a feisty and energetic kid and is always on the go. She is wearing us parents out by the end of the day but we wouldn't have it any other way.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Family Day 2010
Here are some photos from our first Family/Kiya Day :)
We had hoped for warmer weather but we survived. We went to the Farmer's Market in the morning, spent the afternoon as a family hanging out and then went to dinner at a local Ethiopian restaurant.
Kiya and Daddy
Kiya and Mommy. Kiya of course is being super silly.
Family photo...it was dangerously close to bedtime at this point.
Eating the carrots from my dorowat.
Kiya being super silly Kiya. This picture really sums up her personality she is just so full of life and LOVES to laugh.
We had hoped for warmer weather but we survived. We went to the Farmer's Market in the morning, spent the afternoon as a family hanging out and then went to dinner at a local Ethiopian restaurant.
Kiya and Daddy
Kiya and Mommy. Kiya of course is being super silly.
Family photo...it was dangerously close to bedtime at this point.
Eating the carrots from my dorowat.
Kiya being super silly Kiya. This picture really sums up her personality she is just so full of life and LOVES to laugh.It was a great day over all. After we returned home and settled Kiya in her pajamas, we took some time to light our family candle. It has two wicks, one for our family here and one for our extended family in Ethiopia. We then sat down with Kiya and went through the picture book I made of our trip to Ethiopia. In the book is a picture of us with Zinash. We told her all about her Mom. I know she won't remember what we said but we plan to do this every year. As she gets older we will watch her lifebook DVD with her as well. I know that as we discuss her story when she is older there will be questions. Questions we are still working on the answers too but we will get there.
In addition we also made a donation to AHOPE. We will make a donation every year on Family Day. As Kiya gets older we will allow her to decide which charity she would like to donate to.
I am looking forward to many more Kiya days in the coming years.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
The hug felt a year later
It is my first Mother's Day with my daughter. Well technically second. We were in the same country last year on Mother's Day but I wasn't with Kiya. I was on a bus for close to 7 hours that day.
On Mother's Day last year, I met the most amazing woman. I met Kiya's Ethiopian mother, Zinash. The day was emotional. The bus ride long. We sat in a room waiting for our turn with a translator. We had no idea what to expect.
We were in the second group of families to be called. We walked into a small, dark room and then she walked in. This amazingly beautiful, young woman who was on the verge of tears. I offered her a tissue. I asked if it was okay to give her a hug. She agreed.
I could tell she was unsure, a little shy and nervous. So were we. We spent about 20 minutes talking with her. We asked her questions. She asked us questions. It was likely 2o of the most important minutes of my life. Minutes that I want to recount for Kiya. Minutes that I hope to repeat in the future with another visit.
After all of the families met their special people, they gathered all of us together for a blessing and an entrustment ceremony. We shared a prayer and we exchanged a candle. And then it was over. We were to leave. They were to leave.
Zinash and I made eye contact from across the room. I took steps. She took steps and we hugged. We hugged for a long time. It seemed like we hugged forever. We exchanged a lot with that hug. My promise to her that I would love and cherish her little girl. Her faith that I was the right one to be Kiya's mother.
I still feel that hug. I will always feel that hug.
It was the most emotional Mother's Day. Here we were two mother's united for the first time with a mix of emotions. We were strangers and yet we were family. We both had hopes and dreams and lots of love for the same little girl.
Now that I am fully a Mom, Mother's Day will always be special but it will be extra special every year because of that hug. I am honored that we could share that special moment together. That we could share so much with no words.
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!
On Mother's Day last year, I met the most amazing woman. I met Kiya's Ethiopian mother, Zinash. The day was emotional. The bus ride long. We sat in a room waiting for our turn with a translator. We had no idea what to expect.
We were in the second group of families to be called. We walked into a small, dark room and then she walked in. This amazingly beautiful, young woman who was on the verge of tears. I offered her a tissue. I asked if it was okay to give her a hug. She agreed.
I could tell she was unsure, a little shy and nervous. So were we. We spent about 20 minutes talking with her. We asked her questions. She asked us questions. It was likely 2o of the most important minutes of my life. Minutes that I want to recount for Kiya. Minutes that I hope to repeat in the future with another visit.
After all of the families met their special people, they gathered all of us together for a blessing and an entrustment ceremony. We shared a prayer and we exchanged a candle. And then it was over. We were to leave. They were to leave.
Zinash and I made eye contact from across the room. I took steps. She took steps and we hugged. We hugged for a long time. It seemed like we hugged forever. We exchanged a lot with that hug. My promise to her that I would love and cherish her little girl. Her faith that I was the right one to be Kiya's mother.
I still feel that hug. I will always feel that hug.
It was the most emotional Mother's Day. Here we were two mother's united for the first time with a mix of emotions. We were strangers and yet we were family. We both had hopes and dreams and lots of love for the same little girl.
Now that I am fully a Mom, Mother's Day will always be special but it will be extra special every year because of that hug. I am honored that we could share that special moment together. That we could share so much with no words.
HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!
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