The life of an almost 5 year old

Kiya will tell anyone that will listen that she is almost 5 and that her birthday is November 29th. She will also tell you who she wants to invite to her birthday party that has gone form princess tea party with girls only to something else that includes boys.

What I have observed is that for Kiya being almost 5 is proving to come with a HUGE learning curve. There is daily drama at school as to so and so said they won't be my friend anymore so now I am friends with this person, to this person pushed me or this person didn't listen to the teachers. I had no idea friendship drama was so intense in 4k. I believe there is a leader to the drama and thankfully it is not Kiya but alas she gets caught up in it. We stress thanks to her 3k teachers that we are friends with everyone and it is never okay to exclude anyone or make anyone feel bad. Hence we told her for her birthday party if she wants to invite only girls that is fine but it will be every girl in her class. If she wants to invite boys to then the whole class gets invited. Yes I realize I may be crazy as that could be up to 20 invites but no the party will not be at my house and I am sure some people won't come.

The other big challenge for Kiya is she is really starting to realize and comprehend that  other kids can do things that she can't. This is frustrating for her. This weekend she went to a birthday party at a local kids gym that offers cheerleading and tumbling classes for kids. It was an open gym environment and there were lots of activities. That said trampolines are a huge no no for Kiya and there were a lot of those. We allow her to play in bounce houses and luckily there were a few of those but most of the kids formed a huge line at the big trampoline in the middle of the room. My heart broke. I saw the look on Kiya's face and she was obviously upset.

I immediately took off my shoes and gave her some options of things should could do. I even let her run across a tumble track and jump to me a few times and there was a small trampoline that was maybe 6 inches off the ground and I let her hold my hands and jump on that. She said she was having fun and then she would see someone do a cartwheel or forward roll or flip and say "I can't do that. I have a curvy back and a cast on." She even once said "I don't want a curvy back anymore. I just want to do things my friends do." Again heart breaking here.

The reality for Kiya is she will not be trying out for any gymnastics teams in her lifetime. We will have to see about cheerleading as if it is more dancing and some jumping then okay but none of the crazy acrobatic stuff.

To make things even more challenging add Katie into the mix. Katie has a ton of energy and loves to jump. We talked about maybe signing Katie up for gymnastics classes when she is 3. I mentioned this to Kiya and she got mad and said it wasn't fair. She is right it isn't but I struggle as a mom to two girls to find the right balance. To not make Kiya feel different but all the while encouraging Katie to find her favorite activities.

I guess Kiya and I both got smacked in the face with reality this weekend. She is different. She won't do some of the things her friends are doing and while I try to make modifications and help from the sidelines I get the stares and bombarded with the questions. Did she break her collar bone? What is wrong with her? Is the cast going to fix her? Surely you take it off at night and for baths? Luckily, the mom of the girl whose party it was stepped in and said she has seen Kiya in class and the cast obviously doesn't bother her and she does really great with it.

So what do we do now? Good question. I for sure don't have all the answers but I know I have a tough  job ahead. I just hate that at almost 5 Kiya has to learn that life just isn't fair sometimes and we need to pull up our big girl panties and strive to find the things we can do instead of focusing on the ones that we out right can't or shouldn't do. That is a tough life lesson for most adults to comprehend. I am sure there will be tears and probably not just from her but that is our reality. I have Kiya who loves to sing, dance and swim so we are going to focus on those things with her. As for Katie, I have to support and be there for her too. She is still young and has no scheduled activities yet but I can't hold her back. We don't know if gymnastics is her thing or sports or art, who knows but whatever it is I will encourage her as well and help mend the broken pieces of Kiya's heart if it is in fact something she won't be able to do.

Wish me luck....things are going to get complicated.