Adoption is not an easy path. Far from it. Our path got a little more complicated on Friday with the news that Ethiopia was cutting adoptions by 90% starting March 10, 2011.
Sigh. My head realizes that this is the right thing to do. There is too much corruption. Too many lies. I get it. I do. But yet my heart is breaking. My hope and dream of having another Ethiopian born child may not come true.
I am at a total loss. I turn 35 in a few short months. There is no real timeline for an Ethiopian adoption. Yet, supposedly only 5 letters written per day. That is five across all agencies and countries. The Ministry of Women's Affairs only works about 200 or less days a year... we are easily still well in to the high 200's on our agencies waiting list. This could take a few more years or it could all change again in a few months. It is a HUGE unknown.
So we are at a crossroads. Should we stay or should we go? We are torn. We would love to adopt again from Ethiopia. I would want to feel certain that that adoption was truly ethical. Yet am I ready to wait an unknown amount of time....I don't know. Is that selfish....probably.
I can't deny that I am getting older. I had always thought I would be done having kids by the time I was in my early thirties and well life just didn't turn out that way. I truly believe everything happens for a reason and I am beyond thrilled that Kiya joined our family when she did.
Are we meant to find another path to expanding our family? I don't know. Are we meant to only have one child? I don't know.
There are a lot of unknowns right now. We have a lot of questions and not a whole lot of answers. I will be touching base with our country specialist and our local homestudy social worker this week. I am not really sure what I will ask them but I feel like I need to get a glimpse into what might be the reality of the wait to adopt from Ethiopia.
In the meantime I have started doing my homework. What am I researching....well other countries and even domestic adoption. My heart belongs in Ethiopia so in my research I am trying to see if there is room in my heart for a different path. I am terrified of all that is out there but yet excited to see where we might go.
9 comments:
... contact your agency tomorrow... they knew all about this.... you can email me if you'd like... that's what I did and I felt better...... Jodi
jodisart13@yahoo.com
I'm so sad for your family. It is really hard to find out things are not going to be the way you thought when you first began. There IS ANOTHER child for your family. Keep it up! We can't wait to see where the "process" takes you.
You will be amazed what the country that lies in you heart has in store for you! We waited almost 3 years for number 2 our road took a twist and we hit the bumps along the way. In the end we got our Annie so it is Apollo worth it!
Ugh... I'm just sick about everything. We are in the same situation. Wishing you peace in your decision.
My wife Nikki and I are just finishing our dossier for our first adoption (looking for siblings). We both feel our hearts are in Ethiopia, but there is an ache there that I don't know how to remove. We are moving forward as quickly as we can now. Hoping our case worker returns my call from yesterday.
Keep your chin up and things will work out for the best.
Thinking of you guys. Somehow, somewhere, you're going to find the child who is perfect for your family. And you will be the perfect family for that child.
I know exactly how you feel! We've been waiting 21 months...not sure what to do. This is just SO TOUGH!!!
Cathy-
How are you doing with all of this news? I'm going crazy!!! Have you heard anything new? Prayers for you and all of the little pumpkins in Ethiopia waiting for a forever family!
my heart is aching for you and this whole situation. It just plain stinks....and so out of everyone's control. I pray that with talking about it, researching your options and a little time you will know what the right decision is. Wishing you peace in all of this.
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