18 months ago

18 months ago yesterday I walked up 4 flights of stairs and saw my sweet baby girl on the floor. Seconds later her nanny handed her to me and my 6 year long dream of being a mother had finally and really come true.

Here she was this tiny little almost 6 month old piece of perfection. She weighed 12lbs and couldn't hold her head up straight when she was sitting. She couldn't sit up unassisted and she couldn't really bare any weight on her legs. She was so tiny and sweet and well beautiful. I was in love. The feeling was definitely not mutual at first.

Kiya didn't really like or want to be held a lot. She was very independent and very cautious with her eye contact. Sh didn't trust me. To her I was merely a meeter of needs. Food, shelter, clothing, etc. I wasn't yet truly her mother.

Now 18 months later, Miss Kiya loves to snuggle and give hugs and kisses. She can be a little on the clingy side more recently but that is age appropriate. She is a walking, talking, independent and lovely little girl.

We have come a long way in 18 months. She is coming into her own in this new role of being a big girl. She was never much of a baby baby. She never really liked bottles and she still likes to do things or try them by herself. We saw her strength in her referral picture. We knew she was one tough and cautious cookie. Cautious in the who are you and what do you want way. She is a little bit of a daredevil otherwise. She was more so before her cast but that doesn't stop her from trying to climb on the couch or out of bed.

She is smart, funny and really very sweet. These 18 months have not always been easy and she has faced some obstacles but has bounced back and is truly a resilient kid. She never ceases to amaze me.

We have developed this wonderful relationship that I hope nurtures and grows. She listens to me and I to her. We don't always agree and well since she is almost 2 you can imagine the meltdowns but either way our relationship is beautiful. It took time and will always need work but the big thing is she trusts me. She needs me. I need her. We need each other. She has taught me so much and I look forward to teaching her and watching her grow.

And while I rely on 4 shot lattes to get me through toddlerhood, I am so in love with this amazing little person. She challenges me and tests me and sometimes that is hard but it comes with being a parent. And I LOVE being a parent.