Right here, right now

I wasn't going to blog today but as I was going to get coffee this morning, I felt I really should put in writing the things going through my head. (And yes, I realize I have a severe addiction to coffee) So the turkey is in the oven, the house is clean and we are waiting for family to arrive yet my mind is far far away.

This is our last Thanksgiving without our little peanut. I am thinking a lot about peanut today and wondering if they are in the care center or even born yet. I am also wondering about peanut's first family and what they might be going through.

I also know that my life today isn't what I thought it would be yet I can't imagine being anywhere but right here, right now. Sure in my head I wouldn't have pictured my life like this but really I believe everything happens for a reason. I am supposed to be right here, right now. I am supposed to be waiting for peanut to find us. As hard as this is, the waiting, it is what I am supposed to be doing.

So 10 years ago, if you asked me what my life would look like I wouldn't have responded that I was waiting to adopt from Ethiopia but I am. And more importantly I want to be. I need to be. My peanut needs me to be. So as I wait to serve dinner to my precious family on this day of Thanksgiving, my thoughts are with you peanut. I have set a place at the table in my heart for you. You will be here next year to share this day with us.

So thank you God for putting me right here, right now. I may not have always understood why things happen but I am thankful for all things past, present and future.

It is finished :)

THE MURAL IS DONE!!!!

I have finally finished the mural in the nursery. It took me just under 1 month to complete the entire project. I LOVE it and I can't wait to show it off to friends and family oh and my local SW.

The one random thought I have been having is what if it scares little peanut?? It is on the wall directly opposite the crib so anytime peanut opens his/her eyes they will see it. I am sure I am just being paranoid, right???

So little peanut, this was a labor of love just for you. I truly hope when you can see it and appreciate it you will love it as much or more than I do.

Wedding Band

Today and for the third time so far, I had to take my wedding ring in to be repaired. I keep bending the prongs holding the stone in and this time I actual broke the top off of one of those prongs. Everytime the jeweler asks me if I wear it next to another ring and everytime I say no. I am just as baffled as he is as to how this keeps happening.

To try and prevent permanent damage, I will no longer wear my wedding ring to work. This was a tough decision because I don't really take it off unless I am going in water or it is being repaired.

I also brought another ring in to be resized today. This was my grandmother's wedding ring. It is a plain silver band and it was entirely too large. (Try a size 9 down to a size 5 1/2) I haven't really discussed resizing this ring with anyone except hubby so I hope no one is upset by it. I am going to wear my newly resized grandmother's ring to work, Ethiopia and a few other places I am sure.

I can pick both of these up at the jeweler on Tuesday and I can't wait. My grandmother's ring is the only thing I really have from her. I do have some toys, a pillow and some other things from my childhood but this is different. This is the ring my grandfather bought for my grandmother and since they are both deceased it means a lot to me.

In adoption news, I heard from my specialist that we probably won't see anymore referrals until December. Guess what, that is next week so let's just hope it is the beginning of December and maybe if we are really lucky we will see some siblings for those at or near the top of the list. Infants are good too :) oh and toddlers :)

Thankful

I had a great weekend. Mostly uneventful. I purchased all the supplies necessary for cooking Thanksgiving dinner and I finally broke down and bought myself some snow boots. I have been in serious denial about needing them but after last winter I really can't deny it anymore.

I got a welcome surprise on Saturday after a crazy day of shopping. When we pulled into the driveway I had a package by the front door. It was Secret Pal gift time. Yeah!! What a great way to get through our 10 months of waiting. So thanks Secret Pal :) I love the children's book and the bib clip. I know both will come in handy.

Then this morning I logged on to the forum and say my favorite word: Referral! That's right we have moved up another spot. We are now #14 on the unofficial list. There are 4 families ahead of us on this unofficial list waiting solely for siblings so on the unofficial infant list we are #10.

So as I saw that and reflected on the weekend. I really have a lot to be thankful for. Thankful that I could afford to buy food for a big dinner and new shoes. Thankful for the kindness of my Secret Pal and thankful that we are getting a little closer to little peanut joining our family.

Adoption milestones in numbers

So there are lots of numbers going through my head and since we hit a really big milestone (unfortunately) tomorrow, I need to process a little.

2--The number of years ago we started our domestic adoption journey with Catholic Charities

1--year ago tomorrow we submitted our application to CHSFS to adopt our little peanut from Ethiopia and officially withdrew from the domestic adoption program

10--months (tomorrow) that we have been officially waiting for the referral of our little peanut

15--our number on the unofficial list

8--(hopefully less) weeks away from the referral for our little peanut

That is the basic rundown of the adoption numbers in my head. There are definitely things I can't count however that are still in my head and they are:

1) the number of new friends I have made through this process

2) how many times a day I think about our little peanut and their first family

I never thought I would get to this point in our process and not have a referral but yet here we are. And really I am doing as best I can with that. I know there is nothing I can do so I need to pray, reflect and wait. We are very busy with the upcoming holidays and that makes the time go by faster which is A-okay in my book. I know our time will come. I know our family will grow and I will be here to love and nurture our little peanut each and every day. I already love this little peanut and can't wait to see their beautiful face.

Hotline update

I have posted before that our agency has a hotline that we can call and get basic program updates. Well I just called and here is what I learned.

1) Expected wait for referral is still approximately 12 months

2)The wait between referral and travel appears to still be 12-16 weeks

3) There are children at the Addis Ababa care center waiting for medical evaluation before being ready for referral.

4) Additional paperwork is being required from the local court (Kebele) in relinquishment cases where there is 1 or 2 living birth parents. CHSFS has being getting this paperwork for awhile so it shouldn't effect timelines too much.

While, I didn't learn anything earth shattering I thought I would share the latest. Please continue to keep single moms in your prayers. There are lots of rumors flying around right now that we are all awaiting verification on. My heart goes out to these women as if the rumors are true their wait times could increase significantly.

Random musings

Okay today has been kind of a blur so bare with me as this post is going to be random.

1) I am definitely a little sleepy and have some sore arms from the shots yesterday.

2) I was scheduling a hair appointment for 8 weeks from now and that it is in January. Wow, that is sneaking up on me quickly. Everyone at the salon hopes I have some good news to share by then.

3) We just found out we are going to the Dells after Christmas. I already made reservations for the dogs at this really cool pet resort.

4) I am super late in sending out my secret pal gift this month and I feel terrible about it.

5) I am cooking Thanksgiving dinner next week for the whole family and have a TON of stuff to do before then.

6) I have book club this weekend and I didn't read the book.

See lots of random thoughts in my head today and I need to make space for more thoughts and more to do lists.